Lady Talks a Lot

Star Wars the Old Republic took over my Christmas

2011-12-28T15:04:00.000-08:00

For months now all my son and husband have talked about was Star Wars the Old Republic. They both had their pre-orders in as soon as they could. They were on the Star Wars the Old Republic website and forums every single day. I knew more about the Star Wars MMORPG then I ever expected.

I think the last 6 months were all about Star Wars. The countdown to the release was even more important than Christmas. Fortunately they both got to be part of the Beta testing, which they enjoyed immensely. As a result they became even more enthralled by Star Wars the Old Republic.

We have two copies of the game, and two brand new laptops to play the game on. It was a Star Wars the Old Republic Christmas in our house. I even made them wait until Christmas to open their laptops, though they had been playing the game for several weeks at that point – thanks to beta testing and early access.

They are now part of the V Squad. At first the idea of being part of a guild was not something my husband was interested in. When we played Lord of the Rings we had some bad experiences with guilds more interested in getting their numbers up then the actual members. Update - my husband has changed servers. He will be creating his own guild - We are not a guild, guild. If you are interested in joining please contact Fenwolf on the East Coast server - the Jedi Covenent.

There have been days when it has been difficult to pry them away from the game. It is addictive. Huttball is a lot of fun. Though right now Fenwolf (my hubby) is playing Huttball and is getting his butt handed to him. Usually he does ok, but today, even though teams are created by random, it seems to be high level players against lower levels. Just the way things go.

So far the only main issue is the lag time. It has been frustrating players. As Fenwolf said, what is the point of upgrading to better computers if you have to reduce your graphic quality to low just to keep the graphics from lagging? Hopefully that will be fixed sooner than later. (Update was done Dec. 29 that seems to fix the lag)

Fenwolf has some of the Datacron locations. I will be listing them once they are confirmed to help out people playing Star Wars the Old Republic.

I hope everyone is enjoying the game as much as my family is.

It is almost New Years and I have something to say

2011-12-23T10:01:00.000-08:00

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I would love to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

I hope that things are better next year.

I am tired of seeing people go hungry in a world of plenty. And I am not just talking about people being affected by droughts and other natural causes. I am talking about poverty right here, and all over the world. People go hungry every day, most of them children. I hope that this next year people don’t let other people go hungry.

I also want the adults to have jobs and be able to take care of themselves and their children, and for those with jobs, and are still living in poverty, that they get a raise or better paying jobs. I know, more people are looking for work then there are jobs, but maybe that will change this year.

I want children to stop killing themselves or others. Bullying is bad, and kills. I want children to find help, or a place where they are safe and feel safe. I don’t want them to kill themselves to get away from it. I don’t want them to kill others to make it stop. I don’t want bullies taking it to the next level and killing their victims.

I would love to see people being less angry and more caring. I don’t know when people started being angry most of the time, but it would be nice to see people being more accepting, and less angry. If we accept others for who they are, we have no reason to be angry because they are different. At the same time I don’t want people letting themselves be taken advantage of because they are trying to be more caring. I guess it’s a fine line of protecting yourself and being able to care for others. I want there to be a healthy balance in every ones lives.

Most importantly I want people to enjoy their lives and the people in it instead of having to worry about having a roof over their heads, food to eat or a safe place to stay.

May your Christmas be Merry, and next year full of love, security and safety.

We Care to Share Christmas Gift and Craft Show

2011-12-07T18:57:00.001-08:00

In that last few years we have held events to collect non-perishable food items for Hamilton food share. This year we are also collecting unwrapped toys for the CHML toy drive. This year we are holding two events, a Christmas gift and craft show during the day and a Concert and Dance during the night. Please come out and join us Dec. 17, 2011 in Hamilton and help us raise lots of food and toys for girls and boys in need. Christmas is a time to give, and enjoy time with friends and family. The Craft show has wonderful gifts and crafts, and is a wonderful opportunity to find just the right thing for the people on your Christmas list, though you will be tempted to pick up a few things for yourself. The concert and dance is a great time waiting to happen, have a fun night out and support Hamilton Food Share and CHML toy drive.

We Care to Share Christmas Gift and Craft Show:

Door fee, we are collecting non-perishable food for Hamilton Food Share and unwrapped toys for CHML at the door.

Location: ACCA Center

754 Barton St. East, Hamilton

Doors are open from 10 am to 5 pm

The Christmas gift and craft show will officially end at 5 pm however there will be a music concert/show that evening. Tickets for We Care to Share Christmas concert available at the Christmas Gift and Craft Show.

Vendors with crafts and unique gift items

1st Mount Albion Pathfinders and Ranger - Hand knitted items, fleece scarves, chocolate Mint Cookies, Christmas Crafts, Kernels Popcorn, Gifts in Jars, soup and baking, handmade Christmas cards and more.

Mar-Lee Enterprises Inc - Tarot readings, hand crafted dowsing rods, pendulums, angels, jewellery, books and calendars in support of the Erland Lee (museum) home.

Annabobanners – Unique hand puppets – www.annabobanners.com

Shelly Marinic - Scentsy and Avon

Jodie Davis/Sharon Laidlaw - jewellery, Pandora inspired key chains and jewellery.

Sharon Tousignant - handcrafted wood gift items and works of art, crochet.

Kynk Naturals - fair trade organic Shea Butter & other handcrafted personal care products.

Allie Kat Originals - Michelle of Allie Kat Originals designs and crates beautiful hand-crafted bridal jewellery that can be customized to enhance any bridal gown or coordinate with any style and colour of the wedding party and theme of the wedding. Michelle also designs fun, fancy and fashionable everyday fashion jewellery, perfect for every occasion. Allie Kat Originals are high quality at a very affordable price.

PeachieBeads - PeaschieBeads is a green company with jewellery designed and created to giving new life to unwanted jewellery. Very unique jewellery.

Karen Cooke - giftware, toys, games and handcrafted items.

Meghan Candler - Crocheted hats ranging from size newborn to adult as well as crocheted photo props.

Trendy Treatz - cupcakes, chocolate suckers

Kathy Mascola – photography

1 of a kind design – Vinyl Wall Talks, Stick Families Figures, Children Animal Magnets – Portraits on canvas by Tim’s photography.

Delroyoshen – Jewellery

K. Bass - unique scarves and jewellery

The Art of Tea and Tasseomancy - Amy Taylor Tea Leaf Reader, Tea Workshop Facilitator

Laura Elliot - Beaded Jewellery

So Dainty Creations - Jewellery, hair bands

Karina - Fair Trade Chocolate
Jennofer Bramogam - Lighted Glass blocks, hot chocolate cones, chocolate arrangements

Elaine McIvor- Perfumes, I pad, hand knitted items and gift baskets

And many more vendors with wonderful gift and crafts.

Kim Gustafson – One of a Kind Jewellery, candle holders, unique stone & rhinestone mirrors

Natural alpaca – Handcrafted soaps & Alpaca fiber products - socks, sweaters, teddy bears and more

Karen Smith – native crafts, baby swaddling, blankets, it works wraps

Lori-Lee - Steriling Silver jewellery and handcrafted beaded jewellery

We Care to Share 2nd Annual Christmas Concert and Dance

2011-12-06T11:26:00.001-08:00

Country, Rock, R and B, Reggae and Calypso Christmas Concert and Dance

We Care to Share 2nd Annual Reggae Christmas Concert on December 17th, 2011 at 754 Barton St. E. Hamilton, Ontario. Doors open at 6 pm.

Christmas is a time to give and receive. A unique night out to enjoy live music and support Hamilton Food Share and the CHML toy drive - Bring a non-perishable food item or new unwrapped toy and you receive $5.00 off the door admittance.

Live music will be performed by Cordcalling, Karl Slick and son, Junior Miller, Donna Buchanan (Mother Goddess), Ras-An-I, Devon Irie, Captain Cincere, Kush I Krown.

Dance music by Roots Radic Sound, King Commando Sound, Blackstone Sound, Eunique Sound.

Cost is $20 at the door or $15 with a donation of non-perishable food or unwrapped toy.

Parking – on the street and the church parking lot.

This is a wonderful event, fun for all and helps those in need. Cordcalling will be opening, followed by Karl Slick and son with special quests.

Cordcalling

Karl Slick

Junior Miller

Top Star Wars Christmas Gift or Birthday Gift Ideas

2011-12-02T06:12:00.001-08:00

This list is of the top Star Wars Christmas or Birthday gift ideas put together by a Star Wars fan, my husband. My husband’s Birthday is only two weeks after Christmas, so we get him to make only one list for both. Now he does have a list with things on it that are not Star Wars, I think there is three things on it. I know he only looked at one website, but that is fine. If you find the perfect gift for your Star Wars fan on this gift list still shop around, you may be able to find it in a local store or other websites. I did not do any price comparisons, this is just a Star Wars gift idea list. I was just going to put the links, titles and pictures but decided the descriptions and video's are needed. Enjoy! I had a blast (no pun intended) putting this together once my husband gave me the list.

The Star Wars Cookbook

The Star Wars Cookbook is loaded with different types of inter-galactic recipes: drinks, breakfasts, main courses, desserts, and more. Age is no issue when it comes to Star Wars cuisine - kids as well as adults will have a great time with this book.

◦60 wipe clean pages with over 25 recipes

◦Recipes include: Greedo's Burritos, Twin Sun Toast, Tusken Raider Taters, and more!

◦Concealed wire-O binding - so each page lays flat while you cook

◦Includes 13 foil stickers to label your completed creations

Star Wars Vader's Dark Side Roast Coffee

•Gourmet whole bean coffee hand roasted by Stormtroopers

•Perfect for Dark Lords of the Sith... or your friends and loved ones

•Spicy undertones with smoky, dark-roasted complexity

•Coffee blend is comprised of coffees from Africa and Indonesia. Even though these are not certified fair trade, they are specialty-grade coffees which means that droid farmers receive a higher price/pound, compared to exchange-grade coffees.

•Officially licensed Star Wars product designed by ThinkGeek

•Exclusively available at ThinkGeek

•Each bag contains 12 Oz of whole bean coffee

Star Wars Chop Sabers

•Chopsticks in the shape of your favorite Jedi weapons

•Fully licensed Lucasfilm collectible

•Imported from Japan

•Six styles to choose from:

◦Luke Skywalker, green, 23cm long

◦Luke Skywalker, blue, 23cm long

◦Darth Maul, red, 23 cm long -they snap together, too! Not sure how you'd eat like that, though.

◦Darth Vader, red, 23 cm long

◦Yoda, green, 20 cm long

◦Mace Windu, purple, 23 cm long

•Lightsabers do not light up or slice effortlessly through flesh. Sorry.

Star Wars Breakfast Beverages Set

•Three breakfast beverages for fans of Star Wars

•Officially licensed Lucasfilm products, made with love by ThinkGeek

•Included in the set: Vader's Dark Side Roast Coffee, Hoth Cocoa, or Dagobah Green Tea

•Vader's Dark Side Roast Coffee:

◦Gourmet coffee hand roasted and ground by Stormtroopers

◦Spicy undertones with smoky, dark-roasted complexity

◦Coffee blend is comprised of coffees from Africa and Indonesia. Even though these are not certified fair trade, they are specialty-grade coffees which means that droid farmers receive a higher price/pound, compared to exchange-grade coffees.

◦Each can contains 3 oz of ground coffee

•Dagobah Green Tea:

◦Loose leaf blend of Green Pu Erh, White Peony, and Matcha

◦Ideal steeping time is 2 - 3 minutes

◦Each tin contains 1 oz of tea leaves, enough for 14 cups

•Hoth Cocoa:

◦Blended from deep-roasted cocoa beans, sugar, unsweetened chocolate, and real vanilla

◦Each bag contains 8 oz of cocoa mix, enough for 4 - 5 cups

Star Wars Lightsaber Ice Pop
Each Star Wars Lightsaber Ice Pop set comes with four saber hilts: two Luke and two Vader. Just add juice (or any delicious liquid) to the mold, stick on the hilts, and pop the whole shebang in your freezer for 4 hours. Run a little warm water over the mold and the full saber can be removed. Activate your saber's LED for a light up treat that screams awesome and tasty all at once. Included is a recipe book with wonderful flavors to try, like "Chewbapple," "Ponda Berry," "C-3POrange," and Admiral Ackbar's favorite: "It's a Grap(e)!" It's always time for Jedi refreshment when you have some Star Wars Lightsaber Ice Pops. May the force-icle be with you

Star Wars R2-D2 Ice Cube Trays

•Silicone R2-D2 shaped ice tray

•This IS the ice tray you're looking for

•Keeps your drink cold and your X-wing operational

•6 x 4 x 1 inches

•Makes one large droid shaped ice cube and four small

Star Wars Death Star Electronic Attack Shirt

With the press of a button on the concealed speaker box, the Death Star begins the firing sequence. You'll hear the deep hum of the superlaser powering up, then the background chatter of Empire technicians preparing to fire, finally a massive blast is let forth with light and sound effects. Crank the volume for even greater effect; this is one of the loudest shirts in the galaxy.

Star Wars Remote Controlled Lightsaber Room Light

This kit has everything you need to construct a lightsaber and mount it on your wall. Choose from 8 awesome color effects, plus auto-spectrum using the remote control!

•For Ages 6 and Up (with help from a friendly grown-up)

•WARNING: SMALL PARTS - Not intented for children under 3 years of age.

•Awesome lightsaber room light with sound effects and remote control

•Construct and display a lightsaber room light with this kit

•Learn about electronics and how lightsabers work

•Mounts to the wall

•Over 25" long!

•Choose from 8 color effects plus auto-spectrum

•Remote control for easy on/off from anywhere in the room

•Kit includes: Fun & informative learning guide, 2 hilt halves, 1 battery pack, 1 electronics pack, 1 exterior cap, 1 wall mounting bracket, 1 blade, 1 remote, and 1 wall mounting hardware

•Requires 5 AAA batteries (not included)

Tauntaun Sleeping Bag

•Classic Star Wars sleeping bag simulates the warmth of a Tauntaun carcass

•Built-in embroidered Tauntaun head pillow

•Plush Lightsaber zipper pull

•Printed intestines pattern on inside of bag

•Great for playing pretend "Save Luke from the Wampa" games

•Teach your children about the best Star Wars movie ever

•Fully Licensed Lucasfilm™ Collectible

•100% Polyester construction, Machine washable

•WARNING CHOKING HAZARD - Ages 3 and Up ONLY

•For indoor use only. Not suitable for camping.

•One size fits all. Enough room for adults, plenty of space for kids

•Bag Dimensions - 33" x 67" (not including head pillow or legs)

Star Wars Lightsaber Pen

•Available in red, blue, and green

•Comes in a tin collector's box

For more ideas - Star Wars Gift Ideas on Think Geek

Hot toys for boys 7 to 9 in 2011 – Christmas and Birthday gift ideas

2011-11-28T21:34:00.001-08:00

Every boy is different, but there are some common gift ideas that most boys between 7 and 9 would like to receive. The good thing about kids between 7 and 9, they usually are more than willing to let us know what they would like for their Birthday or Christmas.

1. This year video games, computer games and game consoles are on the top of most boys 7 to 9 Christmas or birthday gift lists. The Wii and Xbox Kinect are both popular this year. Hand held game systems are also popular such as Nintendo 3DS. The real problem I have is not finding the games boys 7 to 9 want as Christmas or birthday gifts, but finding ones that are ok to give to them. They seem to want games that are rated for 10+, 13+ and even 18+.

Top video games are going to depend on the system or console they have. On computers the new Star Wars The Old Republic MMORPG is being released Dec. 20, 2012. Star Wars has been popular for generations. So both parents and children are interested in Star Wars - The Old Republic MMORPG. Even though this game is not considered a children’s game many parents are buying it for their children and getting them monthly subscriptions. There are many guilds that include family groups. Kids and parents are both playing. I have been lucky enough to see the game being played by my husband and son as part of the beta testing. From what I have seen the game is amazing, and does the Star Wars legacy proud. However, if children are playing it they may need a parents help unless they are already experienced MMORPG players. You may be able to control what your children do, but you cannot control the other players your kids may come across. Fortunately the game is set up so that kids and adults alike can play in a player verses environment instead of player versus player environment.

The Wii always has several popular games available. I do think that The Legend of Zelda Skyward Sword is going to be a big hit this year. The limited edition bundle with the special Wii remote will probably be extremely popular. Any and all of the Lego Wii games are popular. The Harry Potter 5 -7 will be popular, but I think more because it is a Lego Wii game then because it is a Harry Potter game. Happy Feet Two: The Videogame looks like a lot of fun and so does Puss in Boots. Jaws Ultimate Predator is for teens. Many boys may have this on their Christmas or birthday gift list because they love anything to do with sharks. This has a Teen rating for a reason and should be checked out by the parent before ever letting their son play it. Though I can clearly see why it would be popular with 7 to 9 year old boys.

Xbox Kinect has many games that are of interest. However, Halo is still the game boys seem to want. I think it is too old for them, but for some reason it is very popular with 7 to 9 year olds who have been shown the game. I know my son has been asking for two years to get an Xbox so he can play Halo. There are quite a few other games on the Xbox that 7 to 9 year olds, and older, boys have on their birthday and Christmas gift lists.

2. Hot Wheels wall tracks have got to be one of the more popular toys for boys 7 to 9 this year. They are great, with a starter set and two extra expansion kits. The best part is that they can be moved around, be put up, taken down and put up again. It even looks like it can be easily set up and taken down. I think they are perfect for people with limited room. I know my son loves Hot Wheels. This would be perfect for him. It looks like a lot of fun, and the best part is there is no real clean up when he is done. The cars get put away, and the track stays where it is, up off the floor for the most part. It is not all over the place and because it is on the wall it is less likely that parts are going to go missing.

3. Lightsabers are still big with 7 to 9 year olds. There are new lightsabers out ever year, usually just in time for Christmas. With the popularity of Star Wars it is not surprising that Lightsabers are on many Christmas and birthday gift lists.

4. Lego. The joy of Lego is that there are so many different kits that you can find one for just about any kid. You can find theme items like Star Wars, Ninjas, Cars, Transformers and just about anything else in Lego. There are castles, dragons and even pirate ships. It is difficult not to find a great Christmas or birthday gift in Lego. Also when kids have a lot of kits they can always use the basic box of Lego to build even more stuff. This year the hottest Lego Christmas gift are the Lego advent calendars, the Lego City Advent Calendar and the Lego Star Wars Advent Calendar both have a lot to offer. However, they are going quick. If you want a Lego Advent Calendar you need to buy it early.

5. Yu Gi Oh and other collector or game cards are still popular. There are always new collector game cards coming out. Always check with kids which cards they are into now. It seems to change in the blink of an eye. Also some boys will not be interested in cards anymore, even though they were asking for them just a few weeks ago. My son and his friends still play Yu Gi Oh and have not moved on to the “newest” cards. There is a Wii Yu Gi Oh game out, Yu Gi Oh 5D’s Duel Transer. This came out last year and can be found on sale. It can still make a great Christmas or Birthday gift for boys who love Yu Gi Oh and have a Wii.

6. Bayblade Metal Masters is creating new interest in Bayblades. Bayblades Metal Fusion is becoming more popular again, now that they have the TV show and real live Beyblade battle competitions. There is a huge variety of Bayblade Metal Fusion toys available.

7. Bakugan is still popular. It combines a toy and cards in the game. There are always new cards and actual Bakugan. However, I have noticed a decrease in popularity. I am not sure how much longer this toy/game is going to last. I do think that Bayblades are becoming more popular.

8. Though many boys 7 to 9 may not admit it, Build a Bear is still fun.

I am sure I will come up with more great Birthday and Christmas gifts for boys 7 to 9. Right now Star Wars is the biggest thing in my home. For others families it will be Transformers or other themes. I do find it interesting how many children are being given the new cell phones. They are really mini handheld computers. People like them because they can load music and movies onto them, or go online and play games. I can see that it is like having a phone, hand held game system, computer, camera, GPS tracker and more all in one. I know my son is not ready for one, but some 7 to 9 year olds are.

Christmas and Birthday Gift Ideas for 14 year old boyfriend

2011-11-27T17:10:00.001-08:00

I was recently asked: My boyfriend is 14 and we have only been for a couple of weeks his birthday is next Wednesday what do I get him?!?!?!

Because this is so close to Christmas I am looking at what would make a good Christmas gift for a 14 year old boyfriend as well as birthday gifts.

The first step is to think about what you have in common. What things do you both like to do? What things does he like? Also what type of budget do you have?

For a relationship that is only a few weeks old it can be very difficult to identify a meaningful birthday or Christmas gift. At this point you want something that says. “I like you and I know it’s your birthday/Christmas so I am showing you that I care enough to try and give you something you like”.

Because I don’t have a lot of information I am going to make an assumption, something I don’t usually do. I assume you don’t have a large gift budget, so you want something nice but not expensive. This makes it even more difficult to find the right gift for him. A simple solution is probably going to be the best way to go. It has been a long time since I was 14 but I will do my best here. A lot is going to depend on his personality and yours. You need to think about what you would like to give him, and then figure out what suits him best. The lack of a budget is really what is holding me back.

Here are some Birthday/Christmas ideas for the average 14 year old boyfriend, just keep in mind no one is ever really average.

1) Homemade cupcake with a candle in it, or cake if you like. You can always buy a cupcake if you don’t bake. It is a bit corny but it could be fun, simple and not expensive.

2) Music downloads for his phone, iPod, MP3 player, or computer. CD if he uses a CD player.

3) If he does not have an iPod or MP3 player you can find some inexpensive ones. I have seen some under $20.

4) If you have the budget a video game for a system he already has.

5) A poster or other theme item around something he really likes. Maybe even a T-Shirt or hoodie if you feel comfortable with giving him clothing. It has to be with an image or logo of something he really likes. Sports, music, band, movie or just about anything. I suggested the poster because they are usually not too expensive and you can find a large variety of themes that can fit just about any personality. For example I have in the past found some great unusual theme posters and other items at Think Geek. www.thinkgeek.com. However, don’t limit yourself to just looking at Think Geek. There are tons of theme gift items for just about anything and everything you can think of. Some of them are easy to find, and are not that expensive. Your best bet is to check out what is available at your local store.

6) Theme items that are fun, unique and not too “sappy, committed or clingy”. Again Think Geek has a lot of cool small gifts from clothing to toys that are not for “kids”. There are a lot of items on the Think Geek website that can be great birthday gifts for the right person. However seeing as you only have a few days I would suggest you look at the site for ideas and then find what is available in local stores. You may be able to get a head start on a Christmas gift for him as well.

a. I thought the Led Magnetic digital Graffiti was fun, and not too expensive.

b. If you had been together longer and he was into computers I would suggest the Led flashing Sweetheart kit, though it is corny.

c. The USB plasma ball is something I would actually buy my husband and son, so it kind of fits any age.

d. The Giant plush microbes are different, but fun at the same time.

e. There is the Melodyhorn Air Powered Synth if he likes to play music.

f. The crystal growing kit and the root beer brewing kit both looked interested but would appeal to different personalities.

g. The emergency inflatable brain could be funny if he has a sense of humor, but not very “romantic”.

h. The Pentominoes 3D puzzle cubes are good, but only if he likes that type of thing.

7) Very last resort, gift certificate and a card. Only do this if you just cannot make up your mind. It would be better to get the wrong thing and save the receipt then to give a very generic gift certificate unless it is what he actually wants. Though there are times when this is a great Birthday or Christmas gift. If for example there is a movie he really wants to go to but it is not out yet. You could get him a gift certificate for the movie theater to be used when the movie comes out. So really you are buying him something he really wants that is just not available yet. This also works for any CDs, DVDs, or games that are not out yet, but he really would love to get.

The 14 year old boys I know want cell phones, stuff for their cell phones, video games, money, clothing, skateboards, music, movies and anything that they see as adult and not kids stuff. However, I know for a fact that most 14 year olds don’t fit into the assumed stereo type. They may not be adults yet, but that does not mean they are children. Most 14 year olds have distinct likes and dislikes. I have to admit that I am trying to give you general ideas that may be stereotypical simply because I don’t have enough information to go on and I don’t know you or your boyfriend. Also because you are a couple I am not going to give you the same gift advice or ideas I would to a parent.

When it comes right down to it you need to go with your own knowledge about this young man. Find out what he would like, and go with that. Who cares if it fits into the typical gift category or is not what most people would give as a birthday gift or Christmas gift. What is important is that it is from you, and that you know it is something he is interested in. If he loves cooking, get him a cook book or better yet make him one from recipes you find online. If he likes working on cars find him the manuals for some cars, or tools he could use on cars. If he likes to paint get him paints or a sketch pad. The real secrete about finding the right birthday gift is that it is for him and about him, not what other people think he will like or makes a great gift. It is about giving something that is as individual as he is.

Most important is that you do not give something that you would want to take back at a later date, or regret giving later on. This advice is for everyone of any age. It is not a good idea to take or give risky photos. Never give “sexy” pictures, they tend to show up in the wrong places at the wrong time and once they are out there you can never get them back. Never get a tattoo or other permanent body marking with a name on it as a gift. Things change and tattoos are hard to get rid of or change. I say this for two reasons. One a gift should be focused on the person receiving it, sexy pictures and tattoos put the emphasis on you, not them. Second, it is hard to undo some things, like a tattoo and things like risky photos are out of your control once you give them away, or send them by email. There are just some things you don’t want getting into the wrong hands.

Good by Anne McCaffrey, we will miss you

2011-11-22T20:49:00.001-08:00

Anne McCaffrey died in her home Nov. 21, 2012. I am unexpectedly saddened by the death of a lovely lady I never met. Yet she touched my life in such a way that it should come to no surprise that started crying when I heard the news of her death. I am sure there are many others feeling the same way.

I read her books when I was young, and actually have never stopped. They were there for me when I needed to escape to a world where Dragons were real and bad things did happen, but the strong survived. Unicorns lived, talking ships and psychics and other people with unique powers all came to life in her books. They gave me a place to hide in when I needed it and an example of strength when I needed that. Maybe part of it is that her books are really the only connection my father and I had. We both loved her writing, and the only gifts he gave me I have treasured are hard covers of her work.

My favorite books were the Harper series. I have read them so many times the books are falling apart. There is just something about her writing that brings the books to life, make them seem real. It is too bad that she did not live long enough to see her books come to life in the movies. I look forward to seeing the first movie based on her Dragonriders in 2012. I hope the movie is as good as her books, and honors her writing.

She will be missed by many, even those of us who never met her, but enjoyed her writing.

The Final Inspection - A thought for Rememberance Day

2011-11-08T09:33:00.000-08:00

I do not normally post emails sent to me, but this one got to me. Maybe it is because it is so close to Remembrance Day. It might be that my Grandfather was a soldier and my children’s Grandfather was one as well. My Grandfather died when my Father was just a child. My children got to meet their Grandfather only a short time before he passed. Remembrance Day was also his birthday. They miss him and Remembrance Day is very hard for them. I don't believe in war being the answer to anything, but I respect the soldiers who put their lives on the line, and often their lives for us.

A poppy is a small thing to wear to show respect for those who have died, and those who did not. Yet respect has been earned and I for one wear my poppy with pride, mixed in with more than a little sadness.

THE FINAL INSPECTION

The soldier stood and faced God,

Which must always come to pass.

He hoped his shoes were shining,

Just as brightly as his brass.

'Step forward now, you soldier,

How shall I deal with you ?

Have you always turned the other cheek ?

To My Church have you been true?'

The soldier squared his shoulders and said,

'No, Lord, I guess I ain't.

Because those of us who carry guns,

Can't always be a saint.

I've had to work most Sundays,

And at times my talk was tough.

And sometimes I've been violent,

Because the world is awfully rough.

But, I never took a penny,

That wasn't mine to keep...

Though I worked a lot of overtime,

When the bills got just too steep.

And I never passed a cry for help,

Though at times I shook with fear.

And sometimes, God, forgive me,

I've wept unmanly tears.

I know I don't deserve a place,

Among the people here.

They never wanted me around,

Except to calm their fears.

If you've a place for me here, Lord,

It needn't be so grand.

I never expected or had too much,

But if you don't, I'll understand.

There was a silence all around the throne,

Where the saints had often trod.

As the soldier waited quietly,

For the judgment of his God.

'Step forward now, you soldier,

You've borne your burdens well.

Walk peacefully on Heaven's streets,

You've done your time in Hell.'

Author Unknown~

Thinking of all the Canadian American and British Soldiers

It's the Military, not the reporter who has given us the freedom of the press. It's the Military, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech. It's the Military, not the politicians that ensures our right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. It's the Military who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag.

If you care to offer the smallest token of recognition and appreciation for the military, please pass this on and pray for our men and women who have served and are currently serving our country and pray for those who have given the ultimate sacrifice for freedom.

Great Christmas gifts for girls 5 to 8 in 2012

2011-11-05T16:52:00.000-07:00

Christmas is only a few paychecks away yet again. Time to find the best Christmas gifts now, before they fly off the store shelves. As with any gifts, what is the right gift will depend on the girl. However, the popular gifts listed are considered popular because a large number of girls want them.

There is no question about what the top toy for most girls between the ages of 5 and 8 is this year. Anything Lalaloopsy is flying off the shelves already. The large dolls are extremely popular, and there is a nice variety of them to choose from. However, some people are buying many different Lalaloopsy dolls, not just one. I have found them around $30, but there are some around $50. The mini Lalaloopsy dolls are also very popular. They make great small gifts or stocking stuffers.

Monster High dolls are also still popular. They just came out with a new line that seems to be popular. The one hour TV special is only going to increase the popularity of the Monster High dolls. I suspect that Abby Bominable is going to be a popular doll. Though I think Clawdeen Wolf, Draculaura and Franki Stein are going to continue to be very popular as well. I know my daughter would love to receive more Monster High dolls for Christmas. However I found a Monster High video game, which is a great gift. Monster High Ghoul Spirit was released on October 11, 2011. It is available for Nintendo DS and the Wii. The Monster High books, written by Lisi Harrison, may also be a good gift option.

Fijit Friends is another top requested Christmas gift. It is interactive, dances and tells jokes. The kids seem to all respond to the commercials. However, I am not sure how sustainable this toy will be once the first thrill of playing with it passes. The kids seem to love it and ask for it every time they see the commercial, but as a parent I am not drawn to it at all. But then I am not the one who would be playing with it. Who knows, maybe the Fijit Friends will entertain the kids longer then a day or two. As always though it is about what the kids want, not how long they will play with the toy and they seem to love Fijit Friends.

Furreal Friends toys are consistently popular. The small Furreal Friends animals are wonderful for small gifts and stocking stuffers. They even seem to maintain children’s interest. My daughter still plays with the ones she received last Christmas and the last two birthdays. However, she treats them more like dolls then moving toys. The larger Furreal Friends are always popular Christmas gifts. This year Cookie my playful pup is getting a lot of attention. So are the Furreal Friends Newborns, Walking Kitty and Go-Go Playful Pup.

The Teacup Piggy Basic and other Teacup Piggies are cute and little girls seem to like them. They combine the appeal of baby dolls and animals.

Swquinkies and Zoobles are also great Christmas gifts. There are Swquinkies and Zoobles gift for every budget. There are large items – play areas for the Swquinkies and Zoobles and there are small individual Swquinkies and Zoobles for small gifts or stocking stuffers. The Zoobles are like a colourful variation on bakugan. They role, pop open and can be played with. Swquinkies are little dolls, animals and other characters to play with. Swquinkies and Zoobles look cool and they actually get played with. Mind you, they can get lost quickly.

The Wii or Nintendo 3DS can get a great reaction on Christmas morning. More importantly there are always new games coming out that will also get great reactions. For example last year Zu Zu pets where big last year, we found a Zu Zu pets Wii game, which actually got more play time then the actual Zu Zu pets the kids received at Christmas. I found a wonderful Monster High Doll Wii game that I expect will be popular with my daughter for a long time. There is even a Lalaloopsy DS game out this year.

Littlest Pet Shop and Polly Pocket always have new toys that are popular. This year both the Littlest Pet Shop and Polly Pocket have jets out this year. The joy of the Littlest Pet Shop and Polly Pocket is that there is always something new. The toys will range from the very small, and inexpensive, to large and expensive.

Barbie, the always popular theme gift. There are more Barbie gift ideas than ever. There are always new Barbie’s out. Then there are the accessories, cars, pools, planes and even castles. Barbie has more clothing options then most fashion lines. There are movies, video and board games, books and more. You can find clothing, posters, furniture and even crafts with the Barbie theme.

There are many more Christmas gift ideas for girls between 5 and 8. I have only listed ones that have stood out so far this year. If you think a gift is perfect then it probably is, even if it is not on this list or any others. It is about finding the right gift, not always the most popular one.

Portion tips to eat happy and lose weight

2011-10-11T08:02:00.000-07:00

I have to admit that food portions are one of my weaknesses when it comes to losing weight. I don’t like taking the time to measure out my food as I put it on my plate. It is time consuming and a bit frustrating at times. Especially when I am cooking for four, just because I am trying to lose weight does not mean I want to make a meal for my family and a different meal for me.

Also when I go out to eat everything is two to three times more then what I am supposed to have. Everyone wants to know if you want fries with that, even when you order a salad. Taking my kids out for food now feels like a walk in a mind field of food I can’t eat. Excuses, I know. I do know that I am not alone with this. Many Canadians eat 2 to 4 times what they should in a day, calories and food portions.

I have tried the pre-portioned frozen diet meals. They are so small it’s like a snack at times. I still feel hungry after I eat, not a good thing when trying to lose weight. I quickly realized I could eat more, and better if I made my own meals. Of course that means measuring portions. Have you ever seen a 6 oz steak at the grocery store? Most meats are sold in much larger portions then what I should be eating.

I think my real problem is that once I portion everything out on my plate it looks small. I am already dissatisfied, before I even start. 6 oz of meat, ½ a cup of pasta or rice and maybe a cup of vegetables really does not look like much. I love vegetables but when most of the food on your plate is vegetables they kind of loose their appeal.

I have some solutions that give me more control, and help me lose weight.

When I buy my meat I cut it into about 6 oz portions when I get it home. This way I am not tempted to eat the entire steak. OK, I am tempted but this helps me control what I actually eat. I have been able to get 3 to 4 little 6 oz steaks out of one steak from Locco’s. Mind you they do sell large steaks.

This is a good solution for several reasons. I am saving money. I can buy the bigger family packages of meat, usually at a lower price then single steaks. I can cut them into 6 oz pieces and freeze them. Then I just pull out what I need, already portioned. If you do this please use wax paper. Put them on a cookie tray, freeze them and then put them into a freezer bag. Sometimes I freeze the meat with the marinade, or BBQ sauce. This way it marinades itself as it defrosts. Also with the meat already cut into smaller sizes I can give my kids their own steak. They see me pulling out a steak for each of them, not cutting a steak in half and making them share. Same amount of meat, but it makes them feel special because they are not sharing. I completely understand. It is psychological, if I cook a big steak I want to eat a big steak. I feel ripped off if I have to portion it once I cook it. So I pre-portion in advance.

I make my own hamburgers and meat balls. This lets me control the fat content, what goes into them and portion size. Most premade hamburgers in stores are not 6 oz. I make 6 oz hamburgers and that is what I get. I tend to add vegetables into the hamburger mix, mushrooms, celery, garlic, onions, green peppers, and even zucchini. They are all cut very small. This adds flavor and I can usually make a slightly bigger burger. The trick with 6 oz burgers is to add a lot of healthy toppings, like lettuce, tomato, cucumber, onions and pickles. I know one person who adds sauerkraut and another who like lots of bean sprouts on their burgers.

Again my problem is that 6 oz just does not look like much when on a plate. Then I realized I already love a couple of different meals where 6 oz of meat does not look small. And I feel full and satisfied when I am done a bonus when you are trying to lose weight.

Stir fry – I make up the vegetables and meat. I make sure there is 6 oz of meat for each person. That way I only have to divide the meat evenly to get the right portion. Sometimes I will cook the meat separate from the vegetables. I will make two cups of rice. Each person gets about ½ a cup on the plate. I place the vegetables on the rice. If I cooked the meat separate I will usually place it on top of the vegetables. However, it looks like more when you mix the vegetables and meat together. There is a huge variety of flavors I can get out of this basic meal. It depends on the meat, sauces and even what vegetables I use. I can mix and match and have completely different meals every day. Especially if I change between rice, pasta and potatoes each time.

Wraps – I will make hot and cold wraps.

Hot ones will usually have rice, cooked vegetables and meat cooked in small pieces, or cut up into chunks or slices. This is a great way to make limited portions into a meal. I will put rice on then meat and vegetables, sometimes cheese and then roll it up like fajitas. This is a great way to have a full meal. They are easy to change up by changing the meat, vegetables and spices or sauces I use. I could have very different hot wraps almost every day of the week.

Cold wraps and sandwiches usually have sandwich meat or thin pieces of cooked meat. This is great with ham or chicken leftovers. The trick with this is to use a nice mix of vegetables cut up small. The lettuce I cut into thin strips. They kind of fluff up and give the wrap some volume, much more than if I just put a piece of lettuce on it. Volume is good when you are eating to lose weight. It helps make you feel full and satisfied. I cut the tomato into little squares or chunks. Everything else I tend to cut into strips, sort of how they cut vegetables for sushi rolls. This way it is easier to wrap, but I still have a lot of vegetables. I like putting on red onions, cucumber and lettuce. I could try mushrooms, bean sprouts and other vegetables, but I have to admit I like the wraps I make and don’t really feel like changing them up much. Sometimes I have cheese, sometimes I don’t. I can have a lot of variety depending on the meat, how I cooked it, the sauces and spices I use. Even the sauces I put on the wrap or bread makes a difference. I like using diet salad dressing instead of Mayo, because it adds flavor.

Soups and stews are a great way to also get more of a meal from smaller portions. I am not that fond of soups and stews, so I don’t make them very often. But I love Vietnamese Beef Noodle soup, a good way to get more out of a little meat. Not always a good choice when trying to lose weight, the noodles are not my friend. But I can still enjoy Vietnamese Beef Noodle soup as long as I don’t have it all the time.

Chili on the other hand we make all the time. I have to keep in mind how much meat I put in and then figure out how much I can eat. I do try to put more vegetables like beans and tomato’s into the chili. This gives me a larger portion to eat. Sometimes I will put it over rice, or potato to make the meal more filling.

I figure if there is a will there is a way. I am going to enjoy what I eat, even though I am trying to lose weight. It is about being aware of what I eat, how much I eat, and when I eat. I can cut back on portions and still be satisfied with my meals.

Weight Wake-up call

2011-10-09T09:45:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago I stepped on the scale and it tells me I am 330 lbs. That is my weight wake up call.

I knew I had started to put weight on again, my clothing was tight, and some pants did not fit at all. I just did not realise how bad it was. I have been fighting my weight since I was 12 years old. I know what it is like to lose a few pounds, only to put them back on again with a few extra of course.

When I was 12 my family started telling me I was fat. They put me on strict fad diets, not healthy at all. I did them all, whatever was popular they put me on it. The cabbage soup diet is the one I remember the most. I was always hungry. They also gave me appetite suppressants, and other diet pills. They used to make me jittery and I felt sick a lot. Mind you not once did they talk to a doctor about my weight, or what I should and should not be eating. If they had the doctor would have told them they were out of their minds. It turns out I was not fat at all, I was actually right where I should have been for my age and height.

My family had this odd idea that all ladies should be 108 lbs or less. It did not matter about age, or height. So as soon as I passed 108 lbs I was fat. I spent years developing what I call a yoyo diet eating disorder. My mother used to starve herself all day, popping appetite suppressants and high fibre pills. Then she would eat a small piece of baked fish, no sauce. She would have a small amount of plain white rice and maybe some vegetables. No butter, nothing.

My first step dad used to take great pleasure in getting me to eat adult portions. Once he took me out to an A & W and actually let me eat a huge burger, fries and onion rings. I am sure there was a dessert, I just remember being able to eat until I was full. The food was so good I kept eating any way. I think I knew I was unlikely to eat like that again for a long time. Even when I was not on a restrictive diet my Mom was all into health food, junk food was not an option.

My second step dad loved taunting me with the food his kids got to have. I would have to make his kids lunches and put their treats and snacks in. Things like donuts, cookies, chocolate bars and candy. All things I was told I could not eat. They used to tease me about it. Often my Step dad would bring out desserts and treats and the family would eat them in front of me. Telling me how good it tasted, etc. For Christmas they gave me a tin of candy, which they ate of course. All I heard every day was how fat I was. Yet I actually was not. Eventually I said no more. I was still restricted to the food they gave me, but I knew one day I would be free to eat what I wanted. The problem was that I was set into a pattern of fad diets and poor self esteem.

Needless to say my step dad and his kids were jerks. One of the first things I remember him telling me was that on my 16th birthday I was to have my bags packed and to get out because at that point my Mother was no longer obligated to take care of me. I was 12 at the time. My mother is so proud of herself. The only time she stood up for me was to insist that I got to stay until I graduated high school. So at 17 I moved out, probably the best thing that ever happened to me. Though I do think I started eating all the wrong foods as a type of delayed rebellion. If it was something they would not let me eat, I ate it.

For about 8 years my weight was fine. Then I put on a few pounds and started the diet to lose weight and put it back on and more cycle. I did weight watchers and other programs, all worked as long as I actually followed them. Once I stopped the weight would come back with a few extra pounds. Eventually I hit 220 lbs. For years I sat at 220 lbs, which was good because my weight was high but stable. I had children, but my weight was right back to 220 lbs within weeks of giving birth.

I went on Depo-Provera and packed on the weight in a couple of months. I put on about 100 lbs and have been trying to lose it ever since. It turns out that birth control is a common cause for weight gain, and having a difficult time getting it off. That was 6 years ago. I have lost up to 60 lbs only to put 80 back on. I was sitting at 300 lbs for the last year. Now I am up to 330 lbs. My health is strongly affected by this, so is my ability to play with my kids and my relationship with my husband.

It does not matter anymore why I put on weight. I have to lose it, properly and permanently. I have learned all the skills I need over the years of going to weight loss programs. Now I have to start using them. This is not about being skinny or looking good. I need to lose weight to get healthy. I don’t want my children to grow up fat because of the example I showed them. They are perfect weight right now and I would never do to them what my family did to me. I also don’t want to die because I did not bother to lose weight. This is about my life, and the quality of my life. I am taking control back, because I have to or I could die way before my time.

Yes I have some really big issues with food, and eating. I have to deal with them and get on with my life. I need to make better food choices, get away from my desk and do things. Even taking a small walk everyday is better then what I have been doing.

As a form of motivation, or possibly a type of accountability, I am going to document my process and progress on Lady Talks a Lot. I hope what I am going through will help others get up and start losing weight. Also if I know everyone is going to know how I am doing I might find it a little easier to actually do what I need to.

For the last couple of weeks I have worked on cutting down how much I eat. I am still eating junk food, candy and chocolates. That I am slowly reducing. I am going to add some exercise to my daily routine, maybe even play with my kids.

When I checked the scale today I was 318 lbs. So I am down 12 lbs. Let’s see if I can lose another 2 lbs this week.

Star Wars the old Republic We are Not a Guild group

2011-09-24T16:38:00.000-07:00

Star Wars the Old Republic announced their release date Dec 20, 2011. This has caused quite a stir within the MMORPG community. Many people have been waiting a long time for this announcement. Suddenly there is an actual date set, and people are very excited.

My husband joined Lord of the Rings online to get MMORPG experience. He has made some friends, and found that he actually like playing MMORG’s. The one thing he did not like was that many people bugged him to join their guild/kinship. He turned that feature off and they started IMing him to join thier kinships.Most guilds on Lord of the Rings seemed to have restrictions, guidelines and regulations.

Suddenly you could not just go play. You were expected to only play with and help people in the guild. You were expected to participate at specific times, in specific battles, and had to play so much each day or week. You could not just go play with anyone and everyone. You could not just play when you felt like it or had the time. You could not join fellowships unless they were part of your guild.

It was not his idea of fun. Now understandably not all guilds are like that. It just felt that the idea of guilds was more restrictive then helpful. Not when you could develop friends, and just play for fun. He liked doing things his way, helping and fighting beside anyone, and just enjoying himself.

Now that Star Wars the Old Republic has an official release date the requests to join a guild went from a couple a day, to a flood. People started giving him a hard time trying to get him to join their guild. Some of them had a hard time taking no as an answer. They don’t seem to understand it is nothing personal. He just does not want to join a guild right now, if ever.

Several people that also play Lord of the Rings with him have also decided that they don’t want to join a guild right now. They like the freedom of doing their own thing on Lord of the Rings and they want to be able to do the same thing on Star Wars the Old Republic.

My husband decided to create: We are Not a Guild group. If you are interested in being part of the guild please contact Fenwolf on the East Coast server - the Jedi Covenent

This is a group for people who do not want to be a part of an actual guild. We all work alone and don't want to be invited to join guilds. There are no alliances or adversaries. If you declare war on someone you are on your own. The group will not aid you.

You can participate as much or as little as you want to in the group. You can develop friendships or fighting groups if you want or just ignore everyone. Any republic players welcome from any age or experience. No politics allowed.

Group has 3 rules only.

1 - Be nice and polite to all members. Clean language as there might be kids and teens

in the group.

2 - No harassing people to join the group.

3 - Don't take any actions or make any declarations on behalf of the group.

IE - Do Not Declare War.

P.S. - The group can vote to change this at a later time if we decide to.

I think it is an interesting idea. A good way to get people to back off and let people play the game they want. It could be a very interesting guild as well. Anyone is welcome, no politics and only three very simple rules. Either people will love it, or no one will.

9/11 the aftershock still going 10 years later

2011-09-12T19:55:00.001-07:00

I knew that the 10th year anniversary would bring back memories and sadness over the senseless loss of so many lives. I did not expect it to affect me so strongly. I did not lose anyone, and I have no personal connection to the tragic event. Yet I started crying within moments of turning on the TV to watch the memorial.

I remember driving my car on the way to work, stuck in traffic, when the news about the first plane crash was announced. I did not care about being late or anything at that point. I was just shocked. When I got into work no one was working. People were on the phones calling friends and family, checking emails, listening online or to radios. A few had access to TV’s. The news took over the day. I think we may have even been sent home early that day. It’s is all just a blur. No one got work done that day.

The lady who worked beside me was hit the hardest in our area. Her husband was at a conference in the States with an insurance company. That company had their offices in the Twin Towers. Fortunately the conference was in another location. Unfortunately only the big wigs from the company were at the conference. They had an entire floor, above where the plane hit. My understanding is that everyone at work that day died. People her husband knew, worked with, talked with were just gone. It was hard on him, and her. They were on the phone a lot that day, even though it was long distance and she was at work. They were scared. He was stuck in the US, with people flying planes into buildings, who know what else was going to happen.

Even though I live in Canada 9/11 changed my life. That day I called my long distance boyfriend and said let’s move in together. I was scared, and who knew what was going to happen. He moved from one end of Canada, BC, to Ontario within 10 days. We have been together ever since, and have two wonderful children. I don’t think that would have ever happened if 9/11 hadn’t. I always said I would never get married or have kids. 9/11 changed that for me.

I think the hardest part of the 10th year anniversary of 9/11 was explaining it to my children. I cried as I told them about how police and rescue workers went into the buildings to rescue anyone they could, knowing they may not come back out. That took courage. I explained how many of the police and rescue workers died that day. It was hard for them to understand the whole thing. Why would someone fly a plane into a building? Why did they want to kill people?

We had to turn the TV off and just have some family time. We did not turn it back on until the kids went to bed. The horrible images were just too much to put them through. One day they will be old enough to learn more about it, but not with Mommy crying as she tries to explain it. 9/11 is a life changer. I don’t want my kids to lose what innocents they have, the trust that all is good in the world and nothing bad is going to happen. That will happen soon enough as they got older.

Even now I feel sad, and cry when I think of all the lives changed in a bad way that day ten years ago.

I like remembering a couple of stories about that day, small simple miracles in a way. One person was running late but stopped for a coffee anyway. Another person called in sick. One person missed the bus/subway. These small things saved their lives. There are many stories like this, but not enough, not nearly enough.

May the people who died that day, and later from the chemicals in the air, may they have peace!

For the people who did this, may you wake up one day and understand that this was wrong! I tell my kids all the time, temper tantrums don’t get you what you want, no matter how big of one you throw. To me 9/11 was just another type of temper tantrum. Someone did not get their way so they did what they could to destroy lives. You know what, they still did not get their way!

Food for thought, Pedophiles that don’t get caught

2011-09-07T15:28:00.000-07:00

I received a very disturbing comment today on my blog posting

Lady Talks a Lot: Pedophiles wives are victims.

Anonymous said...

We are here, we will always be here and the longer and harder you fight....the stronger we become. We are law makers, we are law enforcement, we are the teachers in your schools, the ones who bag your groceries, the ones who service your AC units on hot days, the ones who drop off your mail, we work at Disney Land and none of us look alike. And the cold reality of it....not all Pedophiles are Sex offenders. Most of us never get caught.

Food for thought....

I think that it is true; most of them are not caught. Pedophiles work very hard at fitting in and hiding what they are and what they do. Anyone could be a pedophile. I know that there are several “poor” pedophiles in my area, ones that got caught and are registered as sex offenders. This comment just makes me wonder how many “good” (not caught) pedophiles there are in the same area.

I think that pedophiles pray on the weak and lonely. We need to make our children feel proud, loved and welcome so they can be strong. We need to be there for our children so they are not lonely. Our job is to let our children be children, not victims. We may not be able to find and stop pedophiles but we can try to make it more difficult for them to succeed.

Children need to be heard, believed and trusted. If a child said someone is hurting them or touching them we need listen. The real problem is that the person doing it may not be the person the child say’s is doing it. Many children are scared to tell the truth because they think the person will hurt them or people they love. Sometimes it is the very people who they should be protected by are the ones hurting them. As adults it is our responsibility to listen to the children, even if they are not our kids. Get the police involved, they are often able to get to the truth even when we cannot.

The real crime is that too many people turn a blind eye or deaf ear to those in need.

2011-09-02T12:22:00.000-07:00

I received an email today from a local event in Hamilton, Pagan Pride Day. It is a fun event held in Hamilton every September. Every year they collect food for FoodShare, and it is given to the different food banks in the area. The email touched me and I want to share it with others. I hope it touches everyone else as well. Please give to your local food bank, the need is real and the need is now. I know that kids in my area are going hungry every day, some will be in my children’s classes. I cannot help them all, but maybe all of us can help them by giving what we can to the food bank.

Pagan Pride Day is 1 week away (Sept 10th) and I'm asking you to keep in mind the FoodShare collection we sponsor every year.

Every year at this time the 'back to school' bill takes its toll on the average family ... supplies, clothes, shoes and all of the miscellaneous things needed to start off another school year. Unfortunately for many, sometimes the cost of those supplies come off of the dinner table, no matter how hard you try to budget and the truth of the matter is that the schools do watch for kids without lunches and they will phone home to inquire why the child has no food ... I can't think of anything more heart wrenching then having to admit you have nothing to send with that child and that the only real meal of the day is supper.

Last year the Pagan Harvest Festival & the Wiccan Church of Canada helped raise just under 300 lbs of food for the day. We are sincerely hoping to crack that 300 mark with your help and support. Alot of the grocery stores are having some really great sales right now, $5 can make a huge difference. Please be aware as well that all cash donations that go into the collection cauldron go directly to Hamilton FoodShare where they put it to good use by turning every $1 into $5 worth of food stuff.
Investing in a child is one of the best investments you can make, it’s about building a better future :)

Thank you for your support and generousity ... it is deeply appreciated by so many.

Time for school again

2011-08-31T19:54:00.000-07:00

I don’t know if I am happy or sad that summer is over. We did not do any of the things we planned. Instead we spent the first part of the summer getting over really bad sunburns. We never went back to the beach this summer. We planned to go almost every weekend. It took us a month to heal from the burn we got from one day in the sun. We over did it, and our summer paid for it. We thought we would go places and do things this year. Instead we struggled to pay our bills and did very little.

Now school is about to start, in a couple of days, and we look back at all we did not do. It makes me sad that we did not do much. Lucky for the kids they went to summer day camp and did trips every week. They did lots and did not really notice what we did not do as a family. I think they were just glad to be home and relax on the weekends. We are actually giving them the last week of the summer off of summer camp. They like spending time with us, but we want to make sure they have other children to play with.

Now they are going to be going to school, a difficult thing for our son, and a fun time for our daughter. I am not sure I am ready for the struggles I know are to come. The demand of homework alone is a battle I don’t wish to take on. I know that every day I will have to fight with my son to get him to do his homework. Often he fights me over his homework. He hates school work and homework even more.

He gets picked on by other students and does not like going to school. School work is difficult for him. He has ADHD and an unnamed language based learning disability. We think he may have dyslexia. Overall school is not a fun time for him.

My daughter on the other hand has fun at school. She is a typical student having good and bad days. She gets along with others but tends to be a follower, not a leader. She will be ok with the other kids. So far she seems to be an average student. I am sure she will be fine as long as we work with her, and make sure she does her homework.

I worry that we are not able to do enough for him, and are not doing enough for her. We can only do so much and hope we are doing enough. I just feel anxious. I want them both to have the best opportunities and I am not sure they have. I worry that my son will again have a poor teacher, unequipped and unwilling to work with a child that does not fit the normal behavior pattern. The last couple teachers he had actually made things worse, only the E.A. took the time to understand and help him and the other children stuck in this women’s class.

I worry that I don’t do enough for my daughter because she is fine and my son needs lots of help. I know she acts out to get more attention sometimes. I hope that she does not act out in school to try and get more attention.

Most parents seem to be happy when their children go to school. All I can think about is how difficult this school year may be. Both children have teachers new to the school. I am hoping that this will give both my kids a fresh unbiased teacher who will give them a chance.

Welcome to Lord of the Rings MMORPG, now I am addicted

2011-08-31T16:25:00.000-07:00

Addictions can get you anytime, anywhere. I have never thought of myself as having an addictive personality. I don’t drink, do drugs, hoard stuff or anything I would consider a type of addiction. Even my gambling is “safe”. I play bingo once every few years, I play the lottery weekly and used to spend $10 every couple of months to play online poker. I am addicted to coffee, but have cut it back to one to three cups in a day. So I would never think I could become addicted to anything.

Seems I am addicted to my computer and computer games. I was playing Dragons of Atlantis on Facebook for a bit. Found myself playing for hours on end. I never noticed the time go by. My kids and husband got quite cranky after a couple of weeks. I liked the game but had to stop playing. It is never ending, with new things to do all the time.

My husband made the mistake of introducing me to a MMORPG Lord of the Rings. It is free to play now, and a lot of fun. It blew Dragons of Atlantis away for me. It does not have the strategy aspect I loved on Dragons of Atlantis but the graphics are much better. You can walk around, talk to people, fight things, create things and even find things. There are quests and tasks to do. You can work with people, or alone. Though, at times you are required to form fellowships to finish some quests. I love it.

I am playing a lady hunter who makes jewellery and food. Seems my personality showed up in my game character. I have fun doing tasks and quests but am not very good at fighting with others. I am a little focused on just getting through that I forget about the people playing with me. Not so good, but am working on it. I think it will just take some practice.

My husband tended to take over my character when I did fellowships and skirmish’s. So now that I am actually trying to do them I suck! I just don’t have the skill yet. I will learn it but I have to do group fights at a low level until I get my skill up. I like doing the quests and tasks more than working as a group, but for some things you need to work with a group so I am learning.

I have had to limit myself to how much time I can spend on the game. I thought Dragons of Atlantis had sucked me in. Lord of the Rings is much more addictive. There is just so much to do. Lord of the Rings is so flexible and complex that it works on many levels. Each person is experiencing a different game but playing the same quests and tasks.

You can create unique and individual characters, change their looks and what they do until you are happy. You can create several different characters to play on one account. That way you can be anything and everything in the game. You can even have a home to relax in. There is a hobby, fishing. And you stand there and fish. I think this game is a way to have fun and leave the stress of the day behind, as long as you don’t end up creating problems because you are spending too much time online playing.

My family has made some smart choices about this game. We have limited ourselves to one account with different characters for each of us. This way we have to share the account and the time we spend on it. It would be a bad thing if we each had our own account. It would be too easy to find ourselves playing on different computers for hours. Instead we are limiting our time, but not our fun.

We are working together as a family. We make sure we spend time together off line, and help each other in the game. It is taking a lot of work to make sure we have that balance. Lord of the Rings is just that much fun. I am glad we are playing it the way we are. I am not sure if my husband and son will still be playing once the new Star Wars one comes out, but until then we are having fun together.

Because it is free I am happy to recommend Lord of the Rings to other people. If you do decide to try it out it would be appreciated if you would put Fenwolf1978 as the person who referred the game to you. If you do they will give us some Turbine points that we can use to buy or open up new quests and areas of the map, horses, houses, clothing and more. If you do, thank you in advance. If not, enjoy the game anyway. Look us up, Fenwolf, Mohasaba and Nicdragon. We will be happy to help out with any quests and tasks. You could fight with Fenwolf or Nicdragon. Or you could help me, Mohasaba, be a better team player. Just don’t blame us when you realise you have become addicted to the game.

Working from home - The good, bad and ugly

2011-08-31T14:19:00.000-07:00

For several years now I have worked from my home. I ran my own business for years and now I work for a company doing copy writing for their websites. I love my work but there are some real pros and cons when working from home.

Working from home can be a great experience but it takes the right person to be able to do it. The demands of life always seem to interfere. There is always something more important to do then sit down and work. You have to be strong willed and motivated to make yourself sit down and go to work, even with all the distractions going on around you. There are phone calls, people dropping in and house hold chores crying out to be done.

At times, ok most times, a job is work and is boring. Not too many people enjoy working and do it because they have to. Watching TV, reading a book, talking with friends and playing video games are much more fun than working, even when you like what you do. It can be too tempting or easy to not work when you work from home. For some people working outside of their home is the best option otherwise nothing would get done.

When working from home there are good, bad and ugly things to be said about it.

The Good

• I don’t have to travel to and from work.
• I can work around my schedule.
• I can wear what I want.
• If my kids get sick I am already home, I can be with them and then work when they don’t need me.
• I get a good paycheque and I love what I do.
• I can still work even when I am sick.
• I can avoid most office politics. I can also avoid being distracted from work by co-workers, there is no chatting around the water cooler.
• My work space is mine, I don’t have to share and no one cares what it looks like or what I have on my wall.

The Bad

• It is very difficult finding a job that where you work from home.
• There is no real socializing with co-workers. You tend to work by yourself. At times it does not feel as if you are part of a group. It is not good for people who love to socialize in the office.
• I have to have a work space. Even if I live in a small place I have to have an area that is just for work.
• I supply my own hardware, desk, chair, computer and everything else I need for my job.
• I am responsible for my computer software, internet and protecting my computer. If something goes wrong with my computer I have to pay to have it fixed or buy a new one.
• I pay for internet, electricity and everything else.
• It can be hard to get started some days. There is always other stuff to do. Some days the couch and TV call my name and I don’t get work done.
• If my kids are home I get nothing done.

• I cannot get away from work. There is no leaving it at the office.
• Problems with communication with boss. It can be harder to get hold of my boss then if I worked in the same office. Sometimes it can be difficult to get clear and precise instructions. It would be easier if I was in the office and could see what my boss wanted.
• I forget to stop working. There is no “end” to my work day. I can work 24/7 if I wanted. That means I sometimes forget to stop and eat lunch. Once I lost track of time and was late picking up my kids from school.
• It is not easy, I have real work to do and no one to help me or do my job if I am sick. It is not a cushy job sitting around my house doing nothing. If I don’t work I don’t get paid.

The Ugly

• I am treated different when working at home then I would be in an office.
• People just don’t respect my job.
• Working from home is viewed as not actually having a job.
• It is too easy for people to forget you are working.

o There just seems to be a lack of respect for my job and my work hours. People are always saying they would love to be able to work from home, but when I say that I do suddenly my job is not as important as theirs. It somehow becomes devalued by the fact that I don’t have to dress up and go into an office every day.

o Many people think that because I work from home it is not a real job and I can stop and do other things whenever they want me to. I get phone calls during my work hours when people just want to chat and then they think I am being rude when I say that I have to get back to work. They would never call me at “work” if I worked in an office. But because I am at home that means I am not working and I should be available to them.

o I was taking to child care subsidy. Because I work from home they were telling me they don’t usually give child care subsidies to people who work from home. After all they can watch their kids because they are home. The fact that they cannot get any work done and they lose their jobs is their problem. It would be a different story if I had to leave my home to work. After arguing with them and pointing out that I have a job, with a paycheque, and scheduled hours they had to agree that I have a job and require child care. It was only because I told them that I do have to drop into the office every once in awhile that they agreed that it was a “job”. There is an office to work in but I don’t always work there so I have a real job. The fact that I don’t have a desk there and only go there for face to face meetings with my boss was not as important as the fact that I had to go into the office at some point.

o Even my husband has said to me, you are going to be at home today so you can get all this stuff done. Then he looks surprised when I say “no, I am working”. He used to think that I should be able to stop and do things with him and would actually get upset that I was blowing him off to “work”. That changed when he had a work from home job for a bit. He suddenly understood that being home does not mean I am not working. I think it would have become a big problem if he had not experienced working from home for himself.

Working from home can be very rewarding, but it is not easy to do. I think that I am very lucky to be able to work from home. But that does not make it any easier to actually work from home. I have to make myself go to work every day. It is easier to do so when you are expected to show up someplace and do a job. I don’t have my boss breathing down my neck checking up on me but I still have to get the work done. I am 100% responsible for what I do and do not do.

Another great Jedi Kids Video

2011-06-18T06:25:00.000-07:00

The Jedi Kids Video for the Star Wars the Old Republic MMO

2011-04-25T09:49:00.000-07:00

The Jedi Kids was created to allow Young Jedi and their parents a place to talk and play. To ensure a safe environment for Kids to enjoy the Star Wars Universe and meet other kids to work together on all the team based content of the game. Any one allied with the Republic and 17 and under can join.

http://www.thejedikids.guildlaunch.com/index.php?gid=209570

Jedi Kids guild for kids

My son has fallen in love with Star Wars, the movies, T.V. shows and video games. My husband is going to be trying out the Star Wars the Old Republic MMO when it comes out. My son cannot wait until the game comes out. He is going to play with his dad and then once he has learned how to play he is going to get his own account and character. My husband is going to sit with him and help him play, until he is much older and can play by himself (with supervision.)

To make it safer my husband and another of the dads have started the Jedi Kids guild. This will give kids a safe place to play, with people they know. This will eliminate the worries of the MMO bullies intimidation tactics, abuse and swearing. The Jedi Kids can enjoy the game as they learn to play and hopefully make friends. Most of the game is single player with specific points where group play is involved, unless you are on the group server. I want the people he plays with to be his friends or at least friendly.

I am glad that they are doing this. I don’t want my son’s love of Star Wars games destroyed by other people who think it is fun to pick on new players. Some people think my son is too young to play. I think it will be fine as long as it is with my husband or me. It is not like we would let him play by himself. All his game play and computer time are supervised.

My son is so happy about this whole thing. He gets to play a Star Wars game, gets Daddy time and is looking forward meeting kids from all over the world. He hopes lots of kids join The Jedi Kids Guild.

Top six Easter gifts for girls 5 to 7 years old in 2011

2011-04-07T14:30:00.000-07:00

Easter will be here very shortly. This year my daughter has helped me create a list of what she thinks would be the best gifts for the Easter bunny to give her. Of course there will be the usual chocolate and other goodies hidden for the kids to find but I do like to give each of them one bigger gift, or a couple of smaller toys for them to find.

Lalaloopsy dolls
She has been asking for a Lalaloopsy doll since before Christmas. I am not so sure what the appeal is but she thinks they are great. Yes they are bright and different looking, very creative. She seems to like Jewel Sparkles with the Pet Pink Cat the most. I have found Lalaloopsy dolls costing $29.99 (toysrus.ca) up to $70.00 depending where you look. The Lalaloopsy mini dolls are $6.99 (Toysrus.ca). I can see a mini finding its way into her Easter basket. It is cute and not too expensive.

Monster High dolls
Yet another toy she has wanted since before Christmas. Most of her school friends have at least one of the Monster High dolls and brings them to school all the time. I think my daughter feels left out because they have them and she does not. She has never seen the show so her only contact with the dolls has been commercials and her friends. She wants the Clawdeen Wolf one. I would have thought Cleo de Nile because she is like a princess or Draculaura because she has a lot of pink. No, she really likes Clawdeen Wolf. I have found Clawdeen Wolf from $16.99 to $19.99 online.

Furreal friends
Furreal friends she has been collecting for at least a year. She has dogs, cats and a racing bunny with track. It comes as no surprise she would like more. She has been asking about the furreal friends Kitty Cat ever since she saw it in a store. It is around $50. She also loves the furreal friends snuggimals dress ‘n snuggle, they even have a bunny one that is around $17. I can usually find small furreal friends between $7 and $13 at Walmart.

Zhu Zhu pets
These were big around Christmas. She has a couple from Christmas but she would like a puppy just like her friends at school has. They are very popular right now with all the girls in her class. I found them for about $11. What she has been getting is the baby Zhu Zhu pets. They don’t require batteries, they just have a little ball on the bottom that the role on. They come with accessories, are small and usually under $7. There are many Zhu Zhu pet accessories she would love as well.

Build a bear
Build a bear is always a hit with my kids and they have bunnies. A couple of build a bears stood out to me, the lamb and a bunny. I think that they are cute. However, the real charm of build a bear is that the kids get to build the bear and bring it to life. It is not the same to be given a build a bear as it is to make your own. I would put a build a bear gift certificate in her basket before I would give her an actual “made” build a bear. The clothing on the other hand has unlimited possibilities. She already has a build a bear, so clothing for that build a bear is a great option. The clothing can start off as little as $4 but is usually in the $10 to $20 range. It would be easy to pick up a couple of small pieces or an entire outfit for Easter.

Lego
My daughter would play with my son’s Lego but never seemed to get into like he does. Then for her birthday she was given a “girls” Lego set. The Lego was pink, white and other light colours. The figure was a girl and she could make pets, there were stickers for eyes, flowers and other cool things. Suddenly she was playing Lego all the time, building things and talking about getting more “girl” Lego. I think part of the fun was that I was right there with her, playing and building. There is some wonderful “girl” Lego out there, any and all of it she would like. She would love the pink Lego box with 219 pieces for $21.99 or the large pink Lego box for $39.99, that one even has a horse. I really like the Lego Ville Pet Shop I found for $29.99. It has a girl figure and several pets and it is a little shop. Very cool. I do know she also likes the Mystery Lego Minifigure bags. They are only $2.99 each and it is fun to see what you get. Both my kids are starting to collect them. However they do have an agreement that any girl figures my daughter gets.

Finding the perfect birthday gift for your boyfriend or girlfriend

2011-04-04T18:17:00.000-07:00

I have written a couple of blogs on great birthday gift ideas for your boyfriend and girlfriend. I have had some positive and negative feedback. From the feedback I have the impression that some people just don’t get it. Finding the perfect or greatest birthday gift is not easy; it involves work but more importantly an investment of time and energy learning about your boyfriend or girlfriend. I get asked all the time; what should I give my boyfriend/girlfriend for their birthday. I will keep creating gift idea lists because it’s fun and new things come out every day. People need to understand that lists are just ideas, suggestions and a way to get them to think out of the box and come up with their own gift ideas.

It comes down to communication. Talk to each other about your likes, loves, hates, dreams and anything else that comes up. The more you know about each other the easier it is to give things to each other. Lists of gift ideas don’t mean a thing if you don’t know the person you are giving the gift to. That is why I always say in the beginning of a relationship keep the gifts simple and somewhat generic but still try to take the time to learn what your boyfriend or girlfriend would like. After that finding the right gift should be easy, finding the right gift within your budget can be the hard part.

If you know the person you are buying for it should not be that hard to get an idea of what that person would like. With my husband it is easy to figure out what to give him even after 10 years. We talk to each other, and I don’t try to give him what I think he would like, but what he actually wants. I know what movies he likes, the books he wants and all his weaknesses and I take advantage of that knowledge. The problem is keeping him from buying it before I can give it to him. He usually finds out his gift early because I am trying to stop him from buying something or I keep telling him to wait a few weeks. He figures it out quickly. However there have been more times when I had to return something and come up with a new gift idea because he bought what I was going to give him.

This year I got him something unexpected that he loves. Speakers for his computer that light up and change with the music. He loves listening to music when he works or relaxes. The speakers were better quality than his old ones and he loved the look of them. He put them on his computer right away. I had to think out of the box on this one. Normally I don’t mess with his computer he builds them for fun and always knows what he wants. So I knew he would never expect me to buy him computer speakers. It was great seeing the look on his face when he opened the box.

My husband on the other hand has a hard time figuring out gifts for me, even when I tell him what I want. For years he would give me what he thought I should want not what I told him I wanted. What I wanted never seemed romantic enough to him. So I ended up with romantic gifts that were things he wanted me to have, not things I wanted. It took a long time for him to finally figure out that I was much happier with the so called unromantic gifts. To me they were much more romantic because he took the time to really hear me and understand me, and gave me what I wanted.

This year one of my gifts (from my kids but really my husband) was a bunch of fun socks. I love being gifted unusual, funny and strange socks, anything but plain black or white boring socks. It is a simple gift, but I know my husband and kids have a great time trying to find ones I will like. I like wearing them and remembering when I got them, or having my kids excited because I am wearing the socks they picked out. It may not be a big gift, or a romantic gift but I think they are great.

I like to cook so for the last couple of years my husband has been giving me “cooking stuff” that I will not buy myself. A really nice restaurant quality wok, better quality pots, pans, cookie sheets, cheesecake pans and even a perogie maker. Whatever new cooking fad I am in he gives me what I need to do it.

My husband knows how much I love my coffee so one year I was given an individual cup coffee makes, a coffee grinder that does one cups worth at a time, and a wonderful bag of coffee beans. He likes to surprise me with different types and flavours of coffee beans to try. The man simply knows me, and knows what I like and has learned to give me that.

The point is to learn about your loved one and understand what is important to them and run with it. Who cares if it makes sense to anyone else, or does not seem romantic? All that matters is that it makes your boyfriend or girlfriend happy.

However, there are some people that are impossible to buy for and gift idea lists can be a great help with them, because at least you tried and did not just go out and buy any old thing. I have people in my family like that. It does not matter what you give them it is never the right thing, not expensive enough or not what they really wanted (not that they told anyone what they wanted). With people like that you just try and find what makes you happy to give them because when it comes right down to it they are never going to be happy with what you give them so you might as well be.

Build a Bear Birthday Party was a Success!

2011-02-20T17:58:00.001-08:00

The Build A Bear Birthday Party was a lot of fun. We had 16 out the 19 kids show up. We decided to drop the limit to $20 from $25. It made a difference on how much it cost and it did not reduce the number of bears the kids could pick from by much. Most of the kids picked the Heart Bear (six of them). We had bunnies, Koala bear, one dog, a cat and a mix of other bears. Not all the kids picked $20 bears. Some picked $12 bears and love them just as much as the other kids love their $20 bears. It's not the price that counts when it comes to Build A Bears.

The staff was amazing. They really like what they do, you can tell. They made the party for the kids. I was impressed by them and so were the other parents. Many people stopped and watched the party, kids wanted to join in. People were quit surprised when they found out the party did not cost extra, we just paid for the bears the kids picked. I think a bunch of kids are going to be having Build A Bear parties now. From what some of the parents told me they loved the party and think that there kids loved it as well.

I know the kids loved it. They hugged their bears and had great big smiles. As soon as the party was done there was a rush to the clothing and accessories. Many of the parents had been wandering through the store looking at the outfits as the party went on. Some had outfits picked out before the kids were done. It was funny watching the parents trying to negotiate for the outfits they wanted. For the most part the parents relented and let the kids "help" pick out the outfits, and others the parents got to "help" the kids. In some cases the kids got to pick exactly what they wanted.

Many parents were surprised when we gave them $5 coupons for Build A Bear. We knew that as soon as the kids had bears they would want clothing. We had warned the parents but I don't think they expected to find all the cool stuff. Some of the parents came back after the party to buy their own bears and outfits.

I think Build A Bear can become addictive and it is easy to go from one bear to a collection with lots of outfits and more. I think it is more important for my kids to keep their bears special by not buying a lot of them. We have decided the only way our kids are getting more bears are as gifts from Grandma or if they are invited to Build A Bear parties. Three are enough. Now they can get different outfit instead. They are okay with that. Though my daughter keeps seeing new ones she would like to get. Mind you she sees a lot of things she wants to get everyday. What kid doesn't?

If I could go back would I do the party over again, yes. Would I change anything, no. Will I have another one, yes if my son wants one but the rule is one Build A Bear Birthday party each. The funny thing is it's the adults that want to have an adult only Build A Bear party. Why because when the kids are with us we always buy for them. If we had an adult party the adults can do something special for themselves, and have fun. I guess my husband is right, everyone needs a bear to hug once in a while.

The Build a Bear Birthday Party that took a life of its own

2011-02-09T18:05:00.000-08:00

My daughter asked if she could have a Build a Bear Birthday party. She is turning 6 so sure that sounded like a great thing to do. We knew we needed 6 kids, but in a pinch my husband or I could get a bear. We invited one of her friends, and her sister, and one of my son’s friends. My daughter asked if she could bring a friend from her class. Sure, but our rule is that if you invite one kid from a group you have to invite everyone. No kid should feel left out.

It did not seem like a big deal inviting her kindergarten class to her birthday party, last year we invited her class and only had 4 kids from it. We figured we would have maybe ten kids in total. Last count 19 kids. That is 19 kids each getting a bear from Build a Bear! The limit is $25 per kid that is almost $600. Even if we dropped the limit to $15 it’s still just under $400. OMG! That is much more than the $150 we usually budget.

The strange thing is that we are still letting the kids have a limit of $25. They get one bear. The parents can buy outfits. On top of that we are making cupcakes. Each child is getting a bear, a cupcake, a drink box and a gift bag with toys (we spent about $60 on that already).

Can we afford this, not really! I just started working a part time job and my husband is looking for work. What we have done is saved every penny we have for months so we can do this. Why, because we love our daughter and we committed to the party months ago. We did not expect the number of kids, but we will deal with it. What gets me are the parents of kids we don’t even know asking if their kids can come to the party. Nope, sorry the party is limited to her class and one friend outside of school. That is it. We also had parents complaining about us not buying outfits and lunch for all the kids. They were quickly told that if they don’t like it they don’t have to bring their kids. This party is for the kids, not the parents and the kids are more than happy to be able to pick out and make their own bear.

At this point we have 19 very excited kids counting down the “sleeps” until her party this Saturday. Some kids have been looking online and have already picked out their bear. Others have just been talking about it at school. It has become a major event for all the kids. They are all so happy and excited that it makes us feel good about the party, even if we wished it was not going to cost so much. On top of that we have had several parents take us aside and thank us for doing this. They could not afford to do this for their kids, and they really appreciate that we are willing to do this and include their children. Things are hard for a lot of people, and to be blunt we live in an area full of poor people just like us. It’s only money after all. Making 19 kids happy, giving them positive memories and maybe a much needed bear friend is worth it. After all you’re only a kid once.

Dec. 21 2012 a self fulfilling prophecy

2011-02-07T16:16:00.000-08:00

It is still February 2011 and already Dec. 21 2012 is being felt. 2012 has begun to dominate casual conversations. People are already thinking about having to plan, organize and get things ready for the upcoming event. For the last 20 years or more scientists have been warning us of the consequences of industrialization, pollution and overpopulation. No one really paid attention, so why now. What makes the unknown 2012 disaster real, and not the scientific facts we have had for years. Why are people treating hypothetical 2012 disaster as a fact?

I think because there is a date. The same date comes up in many different cultures and histories as an important date. I think that if the early scientists trying to get people to change had provided a dooms day date, even Dec 21 2012, people would have listened more. But I don’t think they would have changed what they were doing until the deadline started looming. It’s not like the knowledge of Dec. 12 2012 has not been around for a long, long time. Only as the “deadline” comes closer are people reacting.

Is it possible that a natural disaster will occur on Dec. 12 2012, yes! But nature for the most part is unpredictable so a natural disaster can happen on any date, or not happen. People on the other hand are a strange mix of predictability and unpredictability. I think 2012 is going to become a self fulfilling prophecy, not a natural disaster. It is more likely that people will be the cause of any disaster, not nature. Fear can be a powerful force. The date is almost two years away and people are already changing. People are already building survival shelters, stocking up on food and other necessities. Others are planning to move to other countries they feel are more likely to survive a world disaster.

As the date comes closer things will become even more stressful, fearful and dangerous as people start to panic. Terrorist’s activity will increase; both the local and foreign terrorists. It does not matter their message, just the feeling that they have a very tight deadline to express themselves and terrorise people. What better time to strike, when people are already afraid and feeling out of control. Besides, if they are going to die anyway on Dec. 21, 2012 they might as well die for their cause, whatever it may be.

People are already talking about what they are going to do when the riots start, as if it is a foregone conclusion that there will be rioting the closer it comes to Dec. 21, 2012. Many people have already started to act as if there will be no consequences for their actions, or lack of actions. Why does anything matter if we are all going to die on Dec. 21, 2012? So why should they go to school, get jobs, practice safe sex, eat right, and generally take care of themselves? Other people are trying to get jobs so they have the money to be ready for anything on Dec. 21, 2012. They want to survive and are trying to figure out what they need to do.

Personally I just want to be away from any major city (including the one I live in) to try and avoid all the panicky people and the things they do in fear and the need to feel in control. I know what people can do in situations like this. I have seen the riots on TV, I know my history and tales of cities burned to the ground as people panic. In the end the disasters’ will have been created by people’s fears, or by people taking advantage of others fears. Like any self fulfilling prophecy we did it to ourselves.

Boys Birthday Party on a Budget

2010-05-11T19:21:00.000-07:00

This year has been an odd one. Money has never been tighter but we are still trying to give our kids everything we have promised them. This month it is our son’s seventh birthday party. Months ago he told us he wanted to have a Star Wars birthday party. Great, we can do that. We started saving money, and buying things we would need to have the party at home.

We have spent month’s slowly buying items for the grab bags, a few dollars here, and a few dollars there. We have spent way more than we expected and still don’t feel like we are ready. We have 24 grab bags and don’t think it is going to be enough. We have 20 kids confirmed and a possible 16 more. My son wants to invite his friends from his sister’s daycare. He showed up and gave one kid an invite. The other kids saw it so now I feel I have to give them invites as well. That would be another 20 kids invited. I am kind of scared to invite them, but our rule is not to invite one of a group but the entire group. No child should feel unwanted or unwelcome. If it comes to more kids then 24 we will just give smaller grab bags. All the kids will not get the same things but that is ok.

Last year we invited over 60 kids and had 18 show-up at the party, most of them our neighbour’s kids. Quite a few of them were unexpected. But that was ok because we planned for 20 kids and parents. Some of them did not have gifts and that was ok with us as well. One little girl asked if she could still be at the party even if she did not have a gifts, of course. We know what it is like to not have money to buy a gift. We don’t invite lots of kids for lots of gifts. We want the kids to be there having a good time, all the kids not just the ones that can bring gifts.

This year we only invited about 30 kids and most of them are coming. Strangely enough we actually had parents from the party last year ask if they could come to this one even though our kids are not in the same class this year. I guess that is a good sign that people like our idea of a party. If the weather is nice it is outside in the complex’s park that is so nicely placed right out our back door. We have crafts, games and just let the kids run around and have fun. There are no fancy tables, just Mexican blankets on the ground creating a picnic area. It is about fun and letting the kids be kids.

It is a good thing we have a small freezer. When the local No Frills had their dollar sale we bought lots of hotdogs and froze them. We were able to buy three packages for the usual price of two.

We found a great meat store, with a good price on lean hamburger. I have found it saves us a lot of money to make our own burgers instead of buying pre-made frozen burgers. With an $11 package of hamburger, eggs, some bread crumbs and seasoning I can make 24 adult sized burgers, even more when I am making kids sized burgers. It just takes a little time and effort, and not much of that really.

It was funny last year at our son’s party the adults could not get enough of the burgers I made. A couple of people said they had never had burgers like that before. They just never made their own. Homemade burgers are much better then mass-produced frozen burgers. All we have to do now is buy the buns and make the cup cakes.

Every year we make dozens of cup cakes and then let the kids put their own toppings on them. We make sure there are lots of different candies and sprinkles to put on the cup cakes. It leads to some very interesting cup cakes, and a lot of happy kids.

We are keeping the food simple and easy. The only decorations we have this year are balloons and streamers left over from last year. The kids are to bring their lightsabres if they have them. If not we can share. We do have a big table full of crafts for the kids to do. Games are set up inside. We have the Clone war movie if it rains.

It is going to be a good party even if we end up with more kids than expected. They will have fun and that is what it is all about.

The other good thing is that by doing the party the way we do it, we can afford to. We don’t have to pay for a space, or food. We are not looking at $12 to $15 per kid so they can bowl or watch a movie. We can have 30 or more kids and spend between a $100 to $150 instead of that for 10 kids.

I don’t have the stomach for some TV shows today

2010-05-10T06:57:00.001-07:00

I am finding that I just cannot watch some shows anymore. I love shows like CSI and 48 hrs. However I am finding I just cannot watch the shows that involve children, either as victims or killers. There are enough “bad” things happening to children that I don’t need to see it as part of my entertainment. Yes I still enjoy mysteries and seeing how police solve crimes. I just don’t have the stomach or the heart to deal with children being killed even in a TV show. It hurts me to see children being harmed or killed, even as part of a fictional story line.

My real problem is that I know what is being shown on TV is just a reflection of what is going on in real life. Children are being harmed and even killed by those who should protect them, their family, teachers, friends and neighbours.

My husband kids me that I am a big softy when it comes to kids. I am. What I don’t understand is why everyone else does not react the same way. It has become so common place, children being harmed and killed, that it is no longer shocking in the news or a TV show. It has become just another part of life, or death. I don’t expect things to change, but I will not watch shows that have it as part of the plot line anymore. I don’t stand on some moral high ground, or believe I am a better person for not watching the shows. I just cannot watch them without crying and becoming sick to my stomach. It is simply easier for me to change the channel or turn the TV off.

Eugenics verses Reality

2010-05-09T19:18:00.000-07:00

The belief in Eugenics eliminates the belief that one can rise above their lot in life. The reality of it is that most often it is those people who have insurmountable difficulties in life that actually rise so far above their beginnings. It is not a person’s genetics that determines a person’s ability to succeed, fail or simply live out an average life. People need to be judged by what they do, not what their parents did.

Often the children of the extreme rich or over achievers do not have the drive or abilities that their parents do. It does not mean that they are not capable; they just don’t have the need to improve their lives and there for do not try. Other people fight for everything they have. Not all of them succeed, but most of them have more drive than anyone who has never had any need to try. Those that succeed by our standards, wealth or achievement, often surprise people with their humble and often poverty controlled beginnings. Only people who have the passion and drive truly achieve something that makes them stand out. Genetics do not dictate who will have drive, passion, determination and break out of the “average” mould into the astronomical success most of us don’t even dream about.

If people who believe in Eugenics had their way only the perfect children would be accepted. Many “imperfect” children or children of imperfect parents would be brainwashed into believing they could never become or achieve anything of value. This would have resulted in many of the discoveries, creations, and people who have had huge impacts on our lives today to have never been. All because someone told them they could never do anything. Beethoven and Albert Einstein are perfect examples, they would never have been considered perfect and yet they both stand out in history.

So next time you think about telling a child or anyone actually, that they are no good and will never be anything, don’t. You never know what they will not do simply because you told them they could not do it. The cure for Cancer, AID’s, or even the common cold could be lost. All because someone discouraged instead of encouraged.

Celebrate Mothers Day on a Budget

2010-05-03T09:18:00.000-07:00

It is a bit of a surprise for me to realise that Mothers Day is less than a week away. My son was telling me he has all these “things” he would like to buy me for Mothers Day. I let him know that I love the things he makes me far more than anything he could buy me. It is true, but we also don’t have the money for him to buy me anything right now. My son’s birthday is this month as well. All our money is going to his Birthday party.

My daughter is quite happy to make me something for Mothers Day. She loves to paint, draw and glue. Mothers Day is just another opportunity to create something.

My husband on the other hand wants to do something for me for Mothers Day. He wanted us to go out for dinner like we did last year. It is just not going to happen. This year we need to do Mothers Day on a Budget.

For me it is ok that we are not doing much. Mothers Day does not have to involve money. The point behind Mothers Day is to show appreciation, not buy things. There are many things I would love to have my family do for me on Mother’s Day. I am sure there are many things every Mother can think of that they would love on their Celebrate Mothers Day on a Budget list.

Here is my Celebrate Mothers Day on a Budget list:

Let me sleep in and have a shower without everyone trying to talk to me at the same time.
Handmade crafts – cards, pictures, jewellery and more. I love that my kids want to make me something. I try to show appreciation for their effort and that I value anything they make for me. Sometimes it can be difficult letting them be creative, but once the mess is all cleaned up it is worth it. I like things that I am able to use or put up where people can see. I am thinking about getting them to paint rocks for the edge of my flower garden. I am expecting cards and painted flower pots again.
Dinner – This would involve the kids helping Dad make dinner, set the table and clean up after. It may be something small but it lets my kids feel as if they have done something important and valuable for me.
Cake or cookies – This is something that we have the mix for and with Dad’s help they would have a lot of fun making. They could decorate them as they like. It would be fun to see what they make.

Small and simple are what I want. I already know it is too much to ask that they don’t make a mess, no fighting, or to clean the house. For me Mothers Day is not about me getting something but giving my kids a chance to show me they love me, and I love them.

If we had the money there are a lot of things I would love but I would not give up my children’s handmade gifts for them.

Have a Heart Psychic Fair and Spa

2010-02-08T11:34:00.000-08:00

Have a Heart Psychic Fair and Spa is focused on health, wellness and guidance. Overall health involves the balance between mind, body and soul. We are about building beauty inside and out. We also believe in a balance between taking care of yourself and others. We are asking everyone attending to bring a donation of non-perishable food for Hamilton Food Share and help those in need.

Featuring

Angel Readings
Angel Healings
Applied Kinesiology
Astrology
Axiatonal Alignment Therapy
Chakra Clearing
Custome Artwork
Empath
Healing Card Readings
Henna
Hypnosis
Intuitive Tarot Readings
Ion Clease Detox Foot Baths
Law of Attraction Readings
Living Abundantly Coaching
Medium
Medical Intuitive
Mindhi, Temporary body art by local Henna Artist
Organic Aromatic Back Relaxation Treatments
Organic Aromatic Face Relaxation Treatments
Organic Mini Manicure
Organic Mini Pedicure
Palmistry
Personalized Charactures
Positive Trasformation Treatments
Psychic Card Readings
Reiki Treatments
Reflexology
Relaxation Treatments
Rune Readings
Spiritual & Intuitive Readings

Location: The Corktown Pub, 175 Young Street, Hamilton, ON, L8N 1V7

Dates and Times:
Sat. Feb. 13 10 am to 7 pm.
Sun. Feb 14 10 am to 7 pm.
Sat. Feb. 20 10 am to 7 pm.
Sun. Feb. 21 10 am to 5 pm.

This is a wonderful event combining the excitement of psychics and the relaxation and pampering of the spa. Gift certificates will be available, just in time for Valentine’s Day.

We are collecting donations of non-perishable foods for Hamilton Food Share. Please bring a non-perishable food donation and help those in need.

Please contact Lady M at Lady M Tarot Readings for any further information.
905-560-9519
ladym@ladymtarotreadings.ca
www.ladymtarotreadings.ca

Lady M Tarot Readings provides Healers, Tarot Readers, Psychics and other talent for Corporate and private events. This includes one-on-one readings to parties of five to events of five hundred and more. Lady M Tarot Readings has been providing this service since 1992.

50 Christmas gift ideas for her, Girlfriend, wife, mother, daughter or friend in 2009

2009-12-11T13:07:00.000-08:00

I have an odd idea of what is a great Christmas gift for me. My husband is always complaining that my idea of a gift for myself is me actually saying, I need this. I am not a frivolous person. If I want something, then that is a good gift idea. The fact that I want sensible things is beside the point.

So the best Christmas gift for anyone one is what they want, even if it is sensible. It is not as important what the person buying the gift thinks as what the person receiving the gift thinks. So common sense would dictate that if someone says I what this, then that is what you get even if that means the person is not going to be surprised. They will be happy and that is what is important.

Now the real issue is when the lady in your life will not tell you what she would like. Or you have what she asked for and would like to give something else as well. I have put together an excellent list of gift ideas.

50 Quick Gift Ideas:

Sterling Silver Dolphin Stud Earrings - $6.00
Sterling Silver Celtic Pictish Swirl Pendant with 925 Stamp - $9.00
Tiger Eye Ring Size 7 with 925 Stamp - $10.00
Sterling Silver Light Blue Topaz Pendant with 925 Stamp - $10.00
Sterling Silver Yellow Citrine Ring - Size 5 - $12.00

The Skin Type Solution by Dr. Baumann Hardcover - $12.99
Sterling Silver fine ball Chain 18" - $14.00
Dream Sleeper Slim-fitting 2-Pc. Sleepwear Set – $14.99
Celtic Double Spiral Ring - Size 5 1/2 - $15.00
Jessica®/MD Antique-look Copper Earrings - $15.00
Celtic Claddagh Sterling Silver Pendant with Green Stone Chip - $15.00

Sterling Silver Chain 20" - $16.00
Anthony Logistics Deluxe Gift Set Strength - $19.99
Roots® Sterling Silver Crystal Fishhook Earrings - $19.99
Sterling Sliver Dragonfly Ring Size 8 with 925 Stamp - $20.00
Sterling Silver Topaz Pendant with 925 Stamp - $20.00
Sterling Sliver Celtic Knotwork with Amethyst Ring Size 9 with 925 stamp - $23.00
Godiva® Ceramic Fondue Set – $23.99
Sterling Sliver Spinner / Meditation Ring with Celtic Knotwork pattern Size 8 1/2 -$24.00
Celtic Knotwork Sterling Silver Earrings - $25.00
Handcrafted Dark multi-colour iridescent glass bead necklace with Celtic knotwork pendant - $25.00
Red and Blue glass teardrop Beaded Necklace - $25.00

Sterling Silver Tribal Flame Pattern Ring Size 6 1/2 with 925 stamp - $25.00
Discovery Illuminated Ant Gel Habitat - $29.95
Handcrafted Blue eyed Wolf necklace with blue glass beads - $30.00
Spinner / Meditation Ring with Nike and Kate the Farrier's Symbol in A Knights Tale Size 7 1/2 with 925 Stamp - $30.00

Sterling Sliver Celtic Knotwork Pattern Ring Size 13 with 925 Stamp - $33.00
Egyptian Hieroglyph Eye of Ra Handcrafted Soapstone Pendant - $35.00
Sterling Silver Medieval Circle Pendant with 925 Stamp - $35.00
Bohemia Pinwheel 10'' Flared Crystal Vase - $35.99

Discovery Tech Edge Digital Camera - $39.94
Jack Black Signature Silver Liquid Magnetism Gift Set - $39.99
Jessica®/MD 10K Gold Garnet Stud Earrings - $39.99
Sterling Silver Chain 16" - $46.00
Celtic Thistle Brooch Peridoet Center - $48.00
MythBusters: Season 5 DVD Set - $49.95
Pevonia Youthful Vibrance Gift Set - $49.99
Cuisinart® 'SmartStick' Hand Blender/chopper - $59.99
Wii™ Sports Resort™ - 59.99
Oster® 6.1-QT. 2-tier Food Steamer - $59.99 at Sears
Perfume Science Kit - $59.95
Women's Timex® Ironman Triathlon 50-lap Sleek Sport Watch - $62.99
TomTom® One 130 GPS Unit - $99.99
Kodak® Digital Picture 8'' Frame M820 – $103.99

Floral Privacy Screen – $129.99
Emerson® Karaoke System with 5 1/2'' Monitor GQ755 - $149.99
Sterling Silver Chain 22" - $154.00
Wood Construction Java Finish Armoire- $209.99
Canon® Powershot® Red Digital Camera Bundle with Case SD1200 - $219.99
Sterling Silver Chain 24" -$266.00

I would hate to have to tell my son, Sharks are gone.

2009-12-07T18:07:00.000-08:00

My son loves sharks. He dreams of being able to go swimming in the oceans with them. I may have to tell him that is not possible because they were killed to make money. That humanity destroyed something so old, wonderful and majestic not out of fear, but greed.

I was watching a documentary, http://www.sharkwater.com/, about the destruction of sharks tonight. 90% of the world’s shark population has been killed. It was shocking. Men where cutting the fins of live sharks and then tossing them into the Ocean to bleed to death. Millions of sharks are being killed every week. Killed, not to feed the hungry, but to make shark fin soup. It was much like what was done to elephants for ivory, buffalo for tongues and hides, and bears for their gall bladders. Killed for one piece and everything else wasted. I am still scared of sharks, but that does not make what is being done acceptable. This is wrong and must be stopped.

Now some people will not care about the death of sharks. However it must be pointed out that they are a key part of the world ecosystem. Without sharks the Oceans balance will be completely disrupted, causing the ecosystems to be destroyed. The largest part of oxygen comes from the Ocean. The destruction of Sharks will have a huge and negative impact on the production of Oxygen. So if you don’t take a stand against shark hunting to save the sharks, do it to continue breathing. Check out http://www.savingsharks.com/.

I had thought about trying shark fin soup just to see what it was like. Now that I have seen Shark Water I will not try shark fin soup. I hope it is not too late for the sharks and the other species we are harvesting without thought of the consequences. What a legacy we are leaving our children; sorry we used it up, killed it or destroyed it, but enjoy what is left over for as long as you can.

Big problem with a husband making passes at other family members, so what to do.

2009-11-28T20:00:00.000-08:00

Someone recently came to me with a problem and wanted my advice on how to deal with it. To me it seems a simple and clear cut answer. But it is not my family or my problem so it is easy to see why things are happening, and what to do about it. It is much harder when you are caught up in the middle of a potentially explosive family situation that could pull a family apart, and actually is.

The question presented to me was:

I'm the oldest of 3 daughters. I recently told my sister that her husband had been making passes at me for months. It's not the first time he's done something inappropriate. He tried molesting my youngest sister when she was 14 years old. This man at the time was 28-29 yrs old. I broke the news to her a couple years later but she forgave him right away and we had to pretend that nothing happened. My parents didn't want to rock the boat and all I could do is forget about it. Now he is 40 and made passes at me on several occasions. I'm 34. I was waiting to tell my sister when the time was right. She and he were talking about divorce for other reasons a couple months ago and I thought I wouldn't have to say anything since she was going to leave him this time. So I thought. She forgave him again, and I thought that it's now or never. So I told her about the comments he had made and how uncomfortable he made me feel. I expressed my concerns for my own daughter when she turns into a teen. My husband, mother and little sister all knew about this during the whole entire thing. My little sister would tell me that now I knew what she felt for so long while he and my sister lived with her, mom and dad. We are not talking anymore. My mother and little sister won't come out and support me in my points to my other sister. I don't know how to deal with this. They want to continue to pretend it hasn't happened. Any suggestions?

For me the response was clear and easy:

You are doing what you need to do, taking a stand even though it is causing problems in your family relationships. At least now it is in the open and you are not struggling with a lie, or pretending there was not a problem. Denying that there was a problem and living a in a “lie to protect someone else” is incredibly unhealthy for you.

Also a lot of people incorrectly feel guilt, even when they are the victim. Often they take on the responsibility or down play the importance of what was done or said. The number of rapes not reported every day is proof of that. They don’t want other people to know. So your little sister and mother want to keep the family secret in the closet and resent that you don’t and will not support you. They don’t want other people to know. Also if your sister and her husband break up they will feel it is their fault, not the husbands. Odd I know, but again it is why so many people get away with things like this.

If your sister forgave him the first time, she will keep forgiving him. It is either the “us against them”, “I can change him”, or “he will change for me” mentality. Either way she is going to keep on forgiving him almost anything and everything. Don’t expect her to change. I expect he will eventually get caught, and she will forgive him and nothing will change. She may even feel that it is somehow her fault; she was not enough women for him so he looked elsewhere. She will actually try harder to please him so it will not be her responsibility the marriage fell apart. If she cannot keep the marriage together she has somehow failed. Again, odd, but how some people respond to things like this.

Instead keep yourself and your daughter safe and away from him. Don’t expect your family to change, they want to keep their heads buried in the sand and pretend bad things don’t happen. It is more important that you do what is right for you and your daughter.

The real problem I have is that yet again a family is being ripped apart or damaged the actions of one person. That person is not even facing the brunt of the effects he is having. People are actually supporting him and punishing the only family member strong enough to say “enough is enough, this is not acceptable.” People wonder why things like this happen. Why someone gets away with things. This is why, the person willing to talk and take a stand is the one who loses.

Why don’t more people come out and tell someone that they are being abused, hurt or propositioned. They don’t want to be treated like this lady is being treated by her own family. If family is going to treat a person like this for telling the truth, how are other people going to treat them?

Having a Gift and Craft Show this Weekend, but will anyone show up to buy?

2009-11-25T18:01:00.001-08:00

I have been looking at the store flyers that showed up in my mail box today. There are some really good deals that I wish I could take advantage of. Some of the stores are already giving 70 to 80% off this weekend. Not so unusual in the US but unheard of in Canada. Here the big sales are usually saved for Boxing Day, the day after Christmas. The sad part is it does not matter how great the deals are, I just don’t have the money. This has been the tightest Christmas in years, and I am not sure what I can do about it.

We are hosting the All I want for Christmas gift and craft show to benefit McMaster Children Hospital this weekend. Even though it is in a good location, Knights of Columbus Hall in Hamilton at 222 Queenston Rd, we are worried that no one will come to buy things. Why, because no one has the money to spend. We know that the vendors are great, we have a wonderful location and have done as much marketing as we can with our small budget. There are door prizes and a silent auction all to raise money for McMaster Children Hospital.

Admittedly we could have gone with a larger hall, and used all the vendors’ fees for advertizing once the hall fees were covered. Instead we chose to go with the smaller hall and limit the number of vendors we had. Why, just in case very few people show up. As it is we have twenty vendors and had to turn down just as many. We could have filled a huge hall. Vendors are desperate to get into as many shows as they can this year, even little ones that just started out this year.

I am hoping that things work out. We have lots of people show up, our vendors do well and we are able to raise lots of money for McMaster Children Hospital. My fear is that even if lots of people show up, they just don’t have the money to buy things.

Christmas Comes Early to My Home

2009-11-24T16:06:00.001-08:00

In the last few weeks it is like Christmas has taken over my home. It is an unusual occurrence for me; at least this early in the year. Yes I like Christmas but usually we wait until Dec. 1 before starting to decorate our living room. My husband loves Christmas. He watches Christmas movies all year round. If it was up to him we would have the house decorated for Christmas Nov. 1.

This year it seems to be even more important to him to start Christmas decorating right away. We already have all our lights up, a small Christmas tree, with our Christmas gifts under it already. There is a larger tree ordered and a small Santa train. Our kids already have little trees up in their rooms. My husband is even talking about buying more lights and decorating the kitchen and the upstairs hall way. Last year we had lights in the kid’s rooms. I am expecting that to be the next thing.

Not that I mind that much. For me it is more that our kids are very young and with us having Christmas decorations up and gifts out for a month is a long time for them. They are going to want to open their gifts sooner than later. Every year in the past we would put gifts under the tree days before Christmas, not weeks and weeks before. I don’t know how well the kids are going to handle having to look at their gifts for a month before they can open them. I think we may have to put them away for a few weeks.

Things have been very difficult this year. I understand why Christmas is so important to my husband this year. He wants something good to happen, and he wants Christmas to be it. I hope Christmas meets his and our kid’s expectations this year.

Fun trying to find a Halloween Costume that Fits and Looks good

2009-10-20T19:22:00.000-07:00

As a family we went Halloween Costume shopping. It was a lot of fun for the kids, but very frustrating for Mom and Dad. The kids we had no problem finding many costumes that they liked and fit them. If anything we found too many. We ended up buying two at the beginning of October and then three more on the weekend. Still no costume for Mom and Dad though.

For me, Mom, nothing fits. I am a plus size and trust me even the plus size costumes in the stores don’t fit. They usually only go to 22” or 1X. I did not find a single 3X costume for women. There were some nice costumes. Many of them I wish they had come in my size. Most of the costumes ran from about $30 to $60.

My husband had a similar problem. He is tall, 6’ 1”, with broad shoulders. Most of the costumes for men only were for men up to 5’ 10” and were too narrow in the body for him. Many men were complaining about the same issue, that none of the in store costumes fit. Also the selection was limited. Very few costumes for men in comparison to the verity for ladies and children. He could be a vampire, again. Or he could wear a robe and a mask. The costumes for men seem to run into very generic styles. It was psycho Dr. from hell, ghoul, vampire, monk, or the oversized ones with the airbags. Not quite the same quality or quantity of costumes available for the rest of the family.

Many men were actually quite upset with the selections at every store we visited. We hit several large department stores and some smaller outlets. We even went to second hand stores in hopes of finding something. The story was the same everywhere. The solution was to start looking online. We had concerns about the costs of the costumes. I found that the cost was between $30 and $60 for many of the costumes, which is about the same as in store. The real difference was in shipping. Some of the online stores are offing free shipping and discounts to offset the difference caused by shipping. Other sites are charging unrealistic fees for shipping. If you are looking into a costume online take your time to find the stores that are offering the deals.
We did find a selection of costumes that we would like to get. At this point we are going to hold off and try for next year. We will plan ahead and order costumes in advance. That way we don’t have to worry about budgeting for four costumes and shipping all at once. Several of the costumes I liked were way more than $60, more like between $100 and $200.

My husband liked some costumes but found a lot of them in the lower price range to be very cheesy no matter where we looked, in store or online. I think it is just a matter of not having that large of a selection in low cost men’s costumes. There were many awesome larger men’s costumes in the higher price ranges. We may have to invest into the higher quality costumes and plan to use them over and over again. In other words we better like the costumes a lot because that is what we are going to have for the next few years.

Cleaning Crew Cleans Out Valuables

2009-09-22T06:32:00.001-07:00

A Father dies and the vultures move in and not all of them are family. My Father in law went to one of his sons homes and died in his sleep. When my Father in law died someone went into his home and stole all his military medals, right off of his dress uniform.

The only people with keys was a brother who was out of town and only just made it back in time for the funeral, the son who’s home he died in and the cleaning crew. The only people who had the opportunity to take the metals were the cleaning crew. They found out about the death and took what they could find that was easy to sell. The family knows other things are gone, like all the cash in the house, but only know for sure about the medals. Who knows what all they took. My father in law used to stash things through the house for safe keeping.

The lady who inherited everything is going after the cleaning company. All she cares about is getting the medals back. Sure they are incredibly valuable and most likely have already been sold but she wants them back because they very important to my father in law. I am sure the theft of the small things would never have been noticed with all the confusion. Taking the medals off of his dress uniform was going way too far. Again a case of those brought in to help someone helping themselves. I hope the lady is able to get the medals back. However, they probably were sold within 24 hours.

Trying to explain death to a four year old

2009-09-21T19:28:00.000-07:00

Mom, when Grandpa died did he forget our phone number? Why can’t you call him? Did you forget his phone number? All you have to do is fined his phone number and we can talk to him. Why don’t you look for his phone number? If Grandpa forgot our phone number why can’t he write us? Is Daddy bringing Grandpa home with him? When can we see him again?

For a week know I have been trying to explain that Grandpa is gone. That there will not be anymore phone calls. My kids just don’t get it. Today I started balling as they tried to figure out why Grandpa cannot just pick up the phone and call them.

My son, trying to be helpful explained to his little sister that Grandpa did not want to die. But he does not really get it himself. He is the one asking if Grandpa forgot our phone number when he died. He also asked if people forget everything when they die. As if it was a video game where a person can die and come back and start all over again, or at the last level. Death is not an easy concept. He has this idea that Grandpa is going to be coming back.

My daughter has no idea. She thinks he is mad and does not want to talk to us. I keep explaining that Grandpa loved them but that he is no longer here. He has passed on. I keep thinking they get it but then comes another question. When can they talk to Grandpa?

I think it is time for me to go to the library and find some children stories about death and dying so that it can be explained to them in concepts they understand. Not that I expect to find children’s books about death and dying. That is something we try to protect our kids from, not expose them to it in stories.

The last laugh is on us

2009-09-17T10:33:00.000-07:00

My father in law never updated his will. He though he had. He told everyone he had. He even told people what he wanted and who got what. I guess it was all the painkillers talking. In three years of having terminal Cancer he never wrote a new will. The old one is almost thirty years old. It does not include his children. It gives everything to his then girlfriend. Someone he has not seen in decades.

All the promises, plans, expectations and infighting were for nothing because he never changed his will. I feel really bad for everyone involved. Their Dad told them he was splitting everything evenly for his three boys. Now they get nothing, zero, zip. What a slap in the face. All the insurances he said he had, he did not. So now there are huge outstanding bills and fees to pay.

There is a lesson here. Update your will as your life changes.

Potty training regression

2009-09-16T21:02:00.001-07:00

Lots of deep breathing!

I have to keep my frustration and anger in check.

My daughter was potty trained some time ago. Then she suddenly started peeing herself. It was frustrating. Why the sudden change. It was suggested she was under stress, or it could be a control issue, even an expression of anger, or a fear of the toilet flushing noise. There was the stress of knowing she would be starting school (JK) and her best friends moving way. We took her to the Dr. to make sure she did not have an infection. He had some tests and an ultra sound done. Her bladder is small and may not be able to keep up with her body. No explanation for why she was trained before and now is only trained when she wants to be. Her bladder was the same size then as it is now.

So we went back to pull ups. Only to have her not even trying to use the bathroom. She had a diaper on, why use the toilet is she could go in a diaper? Not the reaction we needed. So off come the pull ups, now we start the reminders and timers with no success. She stood in the bathroom doorway and peed on the floor, looking at the toilet. WHAT ARE YOU DOING! I don’t have a chair, couch, bed, rug or spot on the floor she has not peed on.

Now she has changed daycares and will be starting kindergarten next week. She regressed even more. It started at the day care. Two days in a row it was not pee but something even far less pleasant. Both days the daycare worker conveniently did not notice until I picked her up and asked her if she had not noticed the smell. All she had to say was that my daughter did not say anything. Then Grandpa died. Now the real fun begins. My daughter is not even trying to use the toilet. Lots of laundry, frustration and anger.

I am on my third straight day of dealing with a kid who just does not seem to care enough not to go bathroom in her underwear. Anger definitely does not work, nor does showing frustration, sadness or disappointment. Bribery, also known as positive reinforcement, is having no effect.

My husband said to just chill and give it time. She is just not handling things very well. Easy for him to say, he is not here dealing with her little surprises. I am under a lot of stress too, and this is not helping. I don’t get to be stressed though, I am a Mom and as a Mom I am supposed to suck it all up, deal with it and put the best possible face on for the kids.

They are asleep and I am stressing now, and letting it show, and your reading about it. I sure hope this little anti-toilet faze ends soon.

My Father-in-law passed away today

2009-09-13T20:33:00.000-07:00

My Father-in-law passed away today. It was not unexpected. But that does not mean we were ready. He had managed to surprise us over and over again, beating the expectations of the doctors. Surviving with cancer far longer than expected. My children are going to miss him and they don’t even know it yet. He lived half way around the country. We did not get to see him very often, but we tried to talk with him as much as possible. I don’t think they will understand why they suddenly will not even have that contact with him. It is something I will have to deal with as my husband will be leaving to attend the funeral and deal with his family.

I am crying, not for my Father-in-law, but for my children and husband who are now dealing with a tremendous loss. I am sure for my Father-in-law is in a better place. He had suffered enough. He had already let his wishes known. He had a do not revive request. He wanted to live but the quality of his life was not what he wanted. The pain was too much. My children have now lost the only Grandparent that has been a part of their lives. I do not wish to burden their young lives with his death. We will deal with it later in our own way. I feel sorry for my children because they will not have a Grandfather who loves them anymore.

My husband is dealing with anger and frustration from dealing with his family. His Father died today and most of the family only care about will they get out of it. My husband was asked to call his mother. Someone he has only spoken to a few times in the last 25 years. Like maybe three or four times in those 25 years. Her first concern was not that her ex-husband was dead and that her children were grieving the loss of their father. She wanted to know if anyone knew what was in the will. That was it.

I know this is going to be hard on my husband. His father was the only real family he had. He is already overwhelmed by the demands of dealing with his family. It is only going to get worse as he has to deal with more issues. As it is he and his brother already have to fight some of the family to make sure their Fathers wishes are followed. It is going to be harder on him when it finally sinks in that his Father is gone. There will no longer be any phone calls or way too many Christmas presents for the kids from Grandpa. That and more is all gone now. There will never be another gift under the tree from Grandpa again showing that he loves and cares about his Grandchildren and son. I think that is what I am going to miss the most, not the gifts but the demonstrations of love and affection given to my children and husband.

He was a good and kind man to my family and we will miss him. May he sleep in peace.

Cancer, You don’t have to have it to be affected by it

2009-08-29T23:45:00.001-07:00

I don’t have cancer but cancer has always been a part of my life. My Grandfather died of cancer when my Father was a young man. My Grandmother died of cancer when I was in my early twenties; she was only in her sixties. She was soon followed by my Father. He never made it to 40. That is how old I am now.

All my father’s side died young, and from cancer. My mother has had skin cancer and my step father prostate cancer. When my father died I was left numb. I did not feel any grief until a friend and co-work, who at 36 died of breast cancer. Now one of my clients, who I like very much, is under a breast cancer scare. She does not know yet, and is waiting on the test results.

Myself I have had two breast cancer scares, once in my twenties and another last year. My father in law was diagnosed with terminal cancer three years ago. So far he has beaten the odds. We are not expecting that to last much longer. My husband’s grandmother passed, and his father seems to be following her. He was hospitalized last week and no one expects him to leave this time. Though, he has surprised us all several times already. There is always hope.

I worry about my children. They come from two family affected by cancer. What hope do I have that they will not be reached by cancer? It has already taken so much away from them in terms of family alone. I hope it never actually gets hold of them, me or my husband. At times I comfort myself with the thought that they all died because they smoked. However that does not guaranty that they got cancer because they smoked. I don’t smoke and I am trying to condition my children so that they will not smoke.

Until tonight I never realized how much cancer has affected my life and how much it is a part of my life.

Dealing with the loss of friends because they moved

2009-08-25T08:49:00.000-07:00

My neighbor moved and with her my children’s best friends. It was a difficult situation. My children are a bit too young to fully understand the consequences. We watched my neighbor’s children for three days as they prepared for the move and actually moved. My kids loved spending so much time with their best friends. They cried when their best friends drove away for the last time.
My four year old daughter has been asking to visit her best friend, a month after the move. She keeps going to the door and saying, oh they are not home. When will they come home? It would be easier if our neighbor followed through with her promises to both sets of kids. She told them that she would bring her kids to visit. She did not. She sent her boyfriend to pick up their mail from us instead of bringing her kids over to play with mine.

It would also be easier if they could call each other or even do video IM with each other. My neighbor is not interested in letting her kids do that. So suddenly the children my kids have been playing with for half their lives are gone. Now as a parent I have to find some way to teach them how to deal with this loss.

And it is a loss to them. It is not like they can get into a car and visit their friends. They cannot call them or visit them. They are just gone. We have talked about it. My oldest seems to be doing ok. I know he misses his best friend but we are hoping he will make new friends when he goes to grade one. My daughter keeps expecting her best friend to come home and play with her. I am hoping that going into JK will give her the opportunity to make new friends and move on. Only time and new friends is going to make this any easier on my children. Oh, and lots of hugs from Mommy.

Death and Family, Strange mix

2009-06-07T21:29:00.001-07:00

Death affects people differently. Sometimes peoples true selves show up. Other times people don’t act at all like themselves at all. Those seen weak may be the ones that are strong and those seen as strong may be the ones who are weak. A death my pull a family together or rip it apart.

When my father died I did not even tell people at work. It was not a big deal to me. Even years later, I don’t feel much about it. I feel some anger and sadness but there was no real connection or loss. He was the last of that side of the family.

When my Grandmother died, well that was a completely different story. I still have anger that I did not get to attend her memorial service. My father was in charge of it and simply did not tell anyone about it. He took my Grandmothers ashes and dumped them in a rose garden. I don’t even know where. My Grandmother is someone I miss even 12 years after her death. I think about her often, and tell my children about her. She is truly missed.

My husband’s Grandmother died a week ago. He flew out for a week to attend her viewing, funeral and burial. He had not seen anyone in his family for almost 20 years. Strangely enough her death pulled the family together. They came from all over Canada to say good-by. There was over 200 family members directly related to her. She was their Mother, Grandmother or Great Grandmother. People who had not spoken to each other in decades mourned her together. It will be interesting to see if the closeness brought on by her death can survive beyond her loss.

What do you mean my son has ADHD and ODD

2009-05-03T20:35:00.001-07:00

For years I have been trying to improve my parenting skills. I knew I was lacking in them. I had poor examples growing up. So when things were hard I assumed I was doing something wrong. Or I should say: I could be doing things differently. I tried parenting groups and parenting classes. Some of them helped. I learned a lot. I tried to do most of it with little or limited success.

I tried harder. I asked for help. I asked Children’s aid come in help me figure out what was wrong. Well I was sent to a program called the incredible years. It was very help full and informative. But again I only had limited success. I had a very hard time connecting with my kids. I did not have fun with them. I did not want to play with them. I tried to explain what it was like. No one seemed to get it. I thought I was a bad parent because it was so hard. One lady told me at incredible year’s course, “You are supposed to want to play with your kids, what is wrong with you!”

The good thing was that I had asked for someone to come in and help me figure out what I was doing wrong. What did the home visitor from children’s aid tell me after months of coming over to teach me how to play with my kids? It was not me. Sure I had skills to learn still, but no I was a good parent. My kids were classified as being difficult. They directed me to a program called 0-6 at the Shedoks children’s mental health.

After months of observation it was decided to have my son looked at by a special doctor. Conclusion is that my son has ADHD and ODD. I cried. Not because I was happy knowing that there was a real problem and it was not my parenting. No it was because my son is going to struggle for a long time. He will have social issues and problems at school. He now has a label.

The good thing is that the medication he is on is helping him. He is now able to do school work. He is getting along with other children, and playing with them. His violence level has been greatly reduced. More important is that other children want to play with him. He is being included now, not feared and rejected.

For me it was a shock to find out that this is the way it is supposed to be. Not the stressed out unhappy child and parents. My son is fun to be around now. I love hearing what he has to say and what his opinions are. He is a different child. Still very difficult because of the ODD, but way better then the way things were. Now I love being around my kids and playing with them.

Miss the Mist if you can

2009-05-01T18:16:00.000-07:00

Over the years I have seen some bad movies. The Mist Directed by Frank Darabont ranks up there in my list of worst movies. There is just something wrong with this movie. It started off pretty normal. An us against them movie. There is something out there that has us trapped and it wants to eat us. A bunch of people are stranded together and try to survive. Decedents occurs based on people’s dislike of each other and their own fears.

Then the movie starts to become uncomfortable. Not because of gore or violence. Though there is some. No it is the way the people are. How they talk to each other and react to things. People kill themselves. The relationships are not “real”. The plot line is off track and unpleasant. There was only one character that I “liked”. It was the store employee who almost makes it through the movie. He bands together with the main character against the mob mentality. He was the only likeable person. Also one of the few that had much character development.

To be blunt the ending sucks. The movie was not so great, but the ending just kills any positive thoughts I could have had. Sure the SGI was well done. But then what movie in the last year has not put the effort into the SGI work. To me it was a B movie hoping people would not notice it was. It needed a better story line or interaction between the characters to pull me in. Then it needed to something positive going on. It did not. Everything was negative and getting worse. There were no endearing moments.

It did not even feel as if the movie was trying to capture your attention. It was trying to be different and disturbing. All it did was make me dislike it. I did not read the book beforehand. I was not even sure what the story line was before I watched it. It was suppose to be a physiological thriller. It fell short. If you have the opportunity to watch The Mist, miss it. Not worth the bad taste it leaves in your head. Any movie that has the main character kill his son and the other survivors’ moments before rescue is just wrong.

I am missing the fresh organic food from my childhood, but not the work.

2009-04-14T07:31:00.000-07:00

Growing up almost everything I ate would be considered organic these days. Not that I knew that at the time. To me it was just hard work and the way things were. I had no idea that other people did not eat like we did. We had a large piece of land in the outback of BC. There was a very large garden, where everything was grown naturally. Even our compost was natural, a mix of food scraps and chicken manure, not a chemical in sight. Just before dinner I would go out and pick what veggies we wanted fresh from the garden. Eggs were collected once a day. The goats were milked twice a day. Everything was fresh and natural. The chickens, turkeys, goats and pigs were free range and grain fed.

What a shock it was for me when I moved into the big city and had to buy my food at a grocery store. Everything tasted funny. Nothing was fresh, and definitely not organic. I did not know how good I had it until I lost it. To the good old days with fresh organic food. But then I also remember the work involved. Weeds, hand pulled, no pestisides or chemicals used on our farm, milking the goats, collecting the eggs, feeding the animals and cleaning out the chicken coop. We even did our own canning. I am quite happy not to be doing that anymore. Though I do miss the great food I could do without all the work. Not to mention I would have to move out of the city to have the land to grow and raise my own food.

I would love it if we had a company in Canada that would do all the work and deliver it to my home like Abel & Cole. They only deliver in the UK. I would like to get what they call their organic veg box. Each week you get a box of fresh vegetables. They even have boxes for one up to 4 to 5 people. There is a nice mix of vegetables that changes each week. I like the fact that they are the vegetables from small local farms, just like what I grew up on. I could even get a box with a mix of vegetables and fruits. This would also make a wonderful gift basket. I see all these places that sell fruit gift baskets and deliver them, I think an organic gift basket is a nice variation.
They also have free range chicken and other meats. Let me tell you if you have never had a free range chicken before you don’t know what you are missing. It just tastes better, same with fresh organic milk, eggs and yogurt. I liked that they had information about the farmers in a section call the face behind the food; it made it more personal knowing whose food you were buying and how it has affect them. I liked the story about Nick and Christine, and how special their cows are and that by selling the organic milk saved the farm, and the cows.

It was fun looking around their web site, it did bring back memories, and even though they don’t deliver here I will be checking out there site just for the recipes. They have a recipe for Gooseberry Fool that I would like to try. It would be nice if a company tried to do here what Abel & Cole are doing in the UK. I think a lot of small farms would benefit and I would like it because I would know that when I was buying something from them I was getting a good healthy product and helping out a local farmer at the same time. Able & Cole has been doing this for over 20 years. They have to be doing something right.

I know that there have been some companies here that tried to do a grocery delivery service but I think their product was to generic, something I could buy at any store without the delivery charge. Maybe Able & Cole needs to branch out to Canada.

Not the usual Fathers Day Gift ideas 2009

2009-04-07T07:52:00.000-07:00

Every year I struggle with what to give my Grandfather for Father’s Day. I know that most people don’t give Fathers Day gifts to their Grandfather, but I started when I stayed with them when I went to College. The problem I have always had is that my Grandfather is one of those people who buys what he likes so he already has everything. This year I found a web site that has just changed it from desperately trying to find something he will like that my budget can survive to having to pare down what I would like to give him to one that I give him this year and earmark the rest for next year. Though it is more the matter of picking which one do I give him for Father’s Day, then his Birthday and Christmas this year.

It is nice to have to spend more time deciding what gift to give him then trying to find one he might like.

There are two gift baskets for him I am trying to pick from: Gourmet Delights and the Hamper Gift for Him. Both have a nice selection of things he would like. I know he would enjoy the wine and the specialty foods. I am more drawn to the Hamper Gift for Him simply because the snacks are something I know he would enjoy, and with the Gourmet Delights I just think he would like but I am not a 100% he would like as much as the Hamper Gift for Him.

I know he loves Chocolate but I never thought to give it to him for Father’s Day. It always seemed to be a gift for Mothers day. The packaging never looked right to give to my Grandfather. Now I have 4 different Chocolate gifts I would love to give him: Jessica Walker Chocolate Tower, the Chocolate Heaven Gift Box, Guylian Chocolate Hamper or the Chocolate Pyramid gift box. I know my Grandfather would love any of these but I like the box the pyramid one comes in. I am sure he would love the Guylian Chocolate Hamper because it has a nice variety of chocolates. I just know if I send it to his office it would never make it home.

I am going to have to take some time to think this one over. Though there is one gift basket that stands out for me: the Ale and Cheese Gift Basket. Cheese is an addiction for my Grandfather, and I think he would enjoy the ale. It seems to have the perfect combination for him. The more I think about it the more sure I am that this is the right one for this Fathers Day.

Risks when labeling children, do they become the label or do we treat them as such?

2009-02-19T10:18:00.000-08:00

There are several risks when you label children. One is that they identify themselves with the label and then feel that they have no options but to be that label. That is how everyone sees them or that is the behavior expect of them so that must be who they are.

We all label our kids without thinking about it and may be trapping them in a mode of behavior without realizing it. This is so and so, she is really cute or smart, this is so and so he is a great dancer, this is so and so and he is the difficult one, the one with problems, anti social, etc.

The other problem is that people start treating the children based on their label. The cute one gets away with things, the bad one get in trouble all the time because everyone knows he is the bad apple. Or have higher expectations for the smart one, put more demands on that child then others. Or shy one is seen as being anti social, not shy and never gets past it and becomes anti social as a result. Once a child has been labeled it is almost impossible to remove the label. Once a child has been labeled difficult or slow or a problem that is how people see them even when it is not the case.
My 5 year old has been labeled as being difficult, a problem at school and has been removed from the school around 8 times and suspended 6 times. The problem I am having is that he has finally been identified as special needs and we are waiting for him to be tested to identify his needs, but the school has already put the labels difficult and bad on him and treat him as such, not as a child with special needs. We know that they are not working with him, when he gets upset they just remove him from the room and have us pick him up, often making the problem worse.
He is usually trying to tell people something and gets upset because people are not paying attention or listening to him. Removing him from the situation does not teach him how to act in that situation so he ends up repeating the same “errors”, nor does it give him a different set of behaviors that is seen as acceptable. How do they expect him to learn how to behave when all they do is yank him out and remove him? What lesson is learned? That when I scream and kick out I get to go home and don’t have to go to school the next day ether.

He keeps missing out on school activities and he is not learning the academics he needs to be in grade 1. He is losing out because it is easier for the school to remove him then it is to work with him. There is a 6 month or longer wait on the testing that will identify what his special needs are, so we know he is special needs but not exactly what the needs are so it is not on his school file. Once it has been identified and put on his file it is going to be at least 2 years before he will have an EA (an individual to help him though the school day) if he even gets one, and there is a 18 to 24 month wait on getting a speech therapist through the school system. This means that he will live with the label of being difficult until at least grade 3. That’s a long time, and I am sure he will have learned that is how they see him no matter what he does and will take on that label as his own by then.

I have seen this happen to other children, where they are labeled by one teacher and then treated by other teachers a certain way because what their file said about them. I know of one Mother who actually removed her son from school, sent him to his Grandmothers to go to school in her area. His file that said he was inattentive, lazy, below average with anger issues did not follow him. All the reports from the second school said he was above average, worked well with others and strived to learn and there never any mention of anger issues.

So the next year she brought him back, put him into the same school system he had been in before, and what did his old teacher do, made a point of letting the new teacher know what a problem he was. So again he was labeled as “bad” without doing a thing, and a year of positive feedback was disregarded on one teacher's say so. So even though the label was proven wrong it was how he was treated. So think before you label a child or believe a label someone has given a child. Just because someone says it is so does not make it so, that is just their opinion.

First Snow Day

2008-12-20T14:26:00.001-08:00

Friday was our sons first Snow Day ever, the first one where his school was closed for the day. He ended up playing computer games and watching T.V. all the time asking if he could go out and play in the snow.

Now you have to understand that this was not just a snowstorm, this was a huge snowstorm that actually caused Hamilton to shut down. Even the Bus system stopped running. It was cold and not actually a safe time to be outside, and yet that is all he wanted to do.

Eventually the weather calmed down a bit and we went outside for maybe 20 minutes to a half hour before a weather warning flashed on the T.V. telling everyone to get inside. Just as we started in the wind hit again so we were actually quite lucky that we went out when we did.

This is what it looked like trying to look out our windows, and he still wanted to go out into it.

Here is the snowstorm calm enough for us to go out into. Yes this is what it looked like when we were out in it. Can you tell this is a street with houses all down it, oh and a large apt. building just past the tree. What you see is a street full of snow and that is about it.

Here we are out playing in a snowstorm. It is in the middle of the day, and it is dark and well kind of hard to see. What makes this picture fuzzy is all the snow falling.

We came in and what do you think the first thing he asked was? “Can we go back out and play in the snow?”

Christmas light walks

2008-12-17T18:11:00.000-08:00

This year as long as the weather in mild enough we are taking our kids out for Christmas light walks. Today was our first real snowfall and the kids enjoyed playing in the snow and looking at the lights. Here are the pictures of the wonderful Christmas lights we saw. We are going to go out again and take more pictures until Christmas. I hope you enjoy the pictures as much as we enjoyed the walk.

A family tradition; Gingerbread house 2008

2008-12-15T18:27:00.000-08:00

Someone once asked me what my favorite family tradition was and at the time I did not have one. Now I do. This is our third year of making Gingerbread something at Christmas time. We tend to do a mix of whatever kits the kids pick that year. However we do plan to start creating our own design’s, as the kids get older and more creative.

Every year we buy a gingerbread house and gingerbread train kit and then spend the good part of a day making them with our kids. This year our son picked the gingerbread house and our daughter picked the princes castle made with vanilla cookie.

Out of the box every thing comes, all the candy on plates and the icing bags all ready to go. So the fun part is getting everything to hold together. It did not work so well last year, but this year it was perfect.

Then Mom and Dad put the icing on and away the kids go, putting candy every place they can, including inside themselves, lol.

As always we have a lot of fun creating these, however I did notice that for every candy that went on the princess castle one went into our daughter. Can anyone say – sugar high! We went for a walk once we were done just to burn off all the candy our kids ate. They had way more then they are used to. I think the gingerbread house and princess castle look great.

Christmas craft to do with kids - egg carton bells for the tree

2008-12-14T07:17:00.000-08:00

I always like making Christmas decorations with my children. Fist it is fun, second it gives us positive memories, and third it is usually less expensive then buying a bunch of decorations.

This year we had a lot of fun decorating plastic Christmas balls and other ornaments. However last year we made paper egg carton bells, and they look a lot better then expected on the tree. Trust me, I was worried when we were making them, but we had fun and that is what counted, and the kids remembered that they made them last year.

You will need:

Egg cartons. We used the paper ones but the Styrofoam ones might work just as well.
Scissors. We used plan ones but there are some cool shaped ones out there that could make interesting edges to your bells.
Paint and brushes. We used poster paint but almost any paint will do. Just find what is easy to clean up and does not take forever to dry.
Glue and glitter. We used glue and loose glitter last year. This year I invested in Glue glitter – glue that already has glitter in it. I found it easer to work with and clean up, but not as much fun for the kids as loose glitter.
Plastic string, ribbon or even pipe cleaners. This is to tie onto the bell and hang it off the tree.

You cut the egg carton into “bells”. You can clean the edges up for smooth looking bells or just cut the egg carton and leave the shape as is. It is all up to you and how quickly you want to give them to the kids to paint. If your kids are older and you have the funky edged scissors you may want to let them shape the bells.

I used the tips of the scissors to make two little holes or slices into the top of the bell that I will eventually put the string, ribbon or piping into. Then the kids get to paint their harts out. Once the painting is done we put them aside to dry. We actually spent several days painting, a little bit each day.

Once the bells are dry then you have fun with the glue and glitter. I put glue into little bowls and the kids used paintbrushes to put it on and then we held it over a bin and added glitter. We had several different colors of glitter, but eventually we had a bin of multi colored glitter. Some of the bells only have on color others multi colors.

Again we did this for a couple of days. We only did a few bells a day, it made it fun, but because we only did a few each day the kid’s attention was easy to keep. Once they became distracted or frustrated it was easy to stop and put things away until “tomorrow”. It also took all the pressure to finish what we started, or to get them all done by some deadline away. When the time was right we worked on them, and when other things were of more interest we left them alone.

The end result was worth the time and effort, and I am not just talking about how nice the bells look on the tree. The kids enjoyed it; it gave them an inexpensive way to create something special for Christmas. I put the plastic string into the bells, it was a task a little to difficult for a then 2 and 4 year old, but they got to put them up on the tree as I was quickly tying the string.

This is a fun project.

I played the Deal or No Deal game and a five year old put me to shame

2008-12-09T19:05:00.000-08:00

We were at a 5 year olds birthday party at one of those pizza and game places. There was a Deal or No Deal game where you could win tickets for the prizes. It looked like a lot of fun as I watched a 5 year old play. She won 70 tickets, not bad when the big prize is 200 tickets.

Then my son played and won 68 tickets. Not bad. I went and got some tokens to try. There was large group of people at the game when I got back with my tokens so I waited my turn. Well the pizza arrived before I got to the game so I went to dinner and listened to everyone talk about how many tickets they got and how much fun the game was. I had to play. So as soon as dinner was done me and my tokens headed to the Deal or No Deal game.

The five year old girl was playing again when I got there. I cheered her on as she won 150 tickets this time around. The last two cases were the 100 and 200 ticket ones, and she took the deal. Smart move the one she had picked held the 100 tickets.

Then I was up. I picked my case and off we went. To make a long story short the last two cases were for 1 or 10 tickets. I won 1 ticket. I could not believe it. I had to try one more time. Lets just say that I did good taking the 6 ticket deal because this time I picked the 2 ticket case. I am not playing that game again. But it was worth the laugh knowing that 5 year olds can kick my butt on that game.

(Picture is not of the ticket I won, but you get the idea, lol)

Just wish we had taken pictures of my face when I won my one ticket.

The $350 and $450 Mystic Spa prize packs or gift basket contest is up and running

2008-12-05T10:53:00.000-08:00

TALK 820 AM has the Mystic Spa contest on their website now. If you are interested in entering her is the link to the contest page http://www.talk820.com/contests/new/837025/mystic+spa+prize+pack%21.

I wish I could win one of these actually. They are wonderful glass bowls full of candles, incense, an incense holder and several hundred dollars worth of gift certificates, even one for $40 for product on Medieval Magic.

I wish everyone luck with this contest.

Interview on TALK 820 AM December 5, 2008

2008-12-04T20:50:00.000-08:00

I will be interviewed today, Dec. 5, at 11am on TALK 820 AM radio. Several of us will be interviewed; myself (Lady M) and Poppy, Franco and Unity will all be on-the-air being interviewed about December’s Mystic Spa. As many of you know I will be doing readings at the Mystic Spa on Dec. 13, 2008.

TALK 820 will have a contest for five prize packs of goodies from Mystic Spa participants. There are two valued at $450 each and three valued at $350 each. They are worth winning. They include product from the White Flame Candle Company (candy bowls, votives and glass jarred candles and a crystal votive holder) and Medieval Magic (incense and incense holder/ash catcher) as well as a $40 gift certificate for Medieval Magic online store. There are also gift certificates for readings from Lady M, readings from Poppy, readings by Franco, services from Spirit Awakes, for $40 at the upcoming Mystic Spa, Dec. 13, 2008 to be used with any of the talent there.

Listen to the show live online or catch us on the radio, and make sure you enter to win one of these great gift baskets.

I am so looking forward to the interview and the Dec. 13, 2008 Mystic Spa in Burlington.

You know, Santa can see us!

2008-12-01T18:06:00.000-08:00

We decided to go out for dinner tonight, a very rare treat for our children. They were very excited but for the most part behaved very well as we waited for the bus. Once we got on the bus and were actually on our way our three year old started to misbehave.

She was singing and jumping around on her chair, not the thing to do on a moving bus. Then she decided to bite the bus, a place where people put their hands. I gave her the “ONE, don’t put your mouth on that!”

She did it again, and so she got, “That is a two” and a stern look to let her know I was watching her. Clear as a bell you could hear our 5-year-old son tell her, “You know, Santa can see us!” That was it, she sat back on her seat with all the intent of a three year old to be good as gold. You could tell the parents on the bus, they were all laughing very hard.

Child Abuse: When to become “Involved”

2008-11-28T07:12:00.000-08:00

When do you report child abuse and to whom? It is not our job to determine if child abuse is taking place. It is our job to speak for the children who may not be able to speak for themselves or get anyone to hear them.

What about all the horror stories about families and lives being destroyed by false accusations? If you have concerns for a child’s safety or well being it is not a false accusation. Truth be known, more child abusers slip through the cracks then innocent people are found “harmful” to their children.

AS ADULTS WE NEED TO PROTECT KIDS NOT OTHER ADULTS.

If you think there is some type of abuse going on – proof or no proof – go with your gut on this one, call children’s aid and let them know how you feel and why. It is their job to determine if there is abuse or danger to the child. An abuser is going to hide what they are doing so you may only have hints and small incidences to go on. If something feels wrong it probably is.

If you see abuse – then you call the police and report it so there is a record of the abuse, time and date. The police will bring in Children’s Aid but you may want to call C.A. as well.

If a child is in severe danger – call the police. Bring attention to what is happening. Get as many people as possible to intervene for the safety of the child.

If you saw a baby or a child locked in a hot or freezing car you would do what you had to to rescue the child. Why should it be any different if someone is beating a child or abandoning their children for days on end, or “just” hurting them in ways that don’t leave marks?

We are the adults and it is time we placed innocent children before strangers, friends and even family.

There is nothing worse then looking into the eyes of a child you could have saved but did not. Unless it is knowing a child died because you did not want to get involved.

Christmas Does not have to be expensive #1

2008-11-27T18:17:00.000-08:00

My kids love to make things and money is tight this Christmas so instead of spending money on fancy ornaments this year we are buying the less expensive plastic and foam ornaments and having fun making them fancy. Please note that my kids a 3 and 5 so their idea of fancy is not the same as most people, but I can live with that.

One of the first things we did was buy some plastic balls and stickers at the dollar store. We were able to find stickers for all the big name cartoons our kids love, and by putting them on the balls we now have Dora, My little Pony, robot, whinny the pooh and more ornaments for way less then a $1.00 each, and on top of that my kids feel pried because they made those ornaments.

We also bought glitter glue from the dollar store and Wal-mart and used it on the ornaments. It is a good way to go from nice to wow in a kids eyes; let them add sparkles to it. Lets just say I am much happier with the glitter glue instead of glitter and glue. It is harder to put the glue on and then put glitter on with a 3 and 5 year old. You end up with glitter and glue all over everything. With the glitter glue there is much less of a mess, and you don’t have glitter permanently in all your things, and you. Lose glitter has got to be one of the hardest things to clean up.

Over all we had fun, some unusual ornaments made with the memories of making them that we will think of every year we put them up on the tree. I don’t care if some of them are downright odd looking, my kids made that. Also, they make good Christmas gifts, handcrafted ornaments to Grandma.

Sick day turns into a fun tent day

2008-11-25T18:50:00.000-08:00

My kids were both sick with colds so I kept them home just to be on the safe side. However I was not expecting to enjoy the day at home, trapped in a house with two kids not feeling very well. Then the cold medicine kicked in and I had two grumpy kids full of energy.

My kids decided all on their own that it was tent day. We pulled in the chairs from the kitchen and just about everything else the kids could get their hands on and they built a fort (with a little bit of help from Mom). The kids spent most of the day building and rebuilding the fort. The rest of the time was spent in the fort playing with each other and watching TV. They even made rooms for each of them to hang out and a living room that fit both of them, right in front of the TV. The only problem we had was when a blanket knocked down the bowl of chips. But the mess was soon cleaned up and they were off again.

The funny part was other then having me help out a little bit they did not want my attention, the tent was just to much fun. I kind of missed it, but at the same time did not mind that they were playing so well together for two grumpy sick kids. What could have been a difficult miserable day turned into a pretty good day simply because I let the kids do what they wanted to instead of worrying about the mess they were making.

Dealing with Holiday Money Stress

2008-11-24T19:31:00.000-08:00

The last few days (or weeks if I want to be honest) have been stressful. I know the holidays are coming and I am worried about being able to give my kids a good Christmas. I know in my hart that they will love what ever they get for Christmas, but I also feel bad knowing I am unable to get them what they want.

This year it is different. Last year we put ourselves in DEBT to give them a wonderful Christmas, and we still have not gotten out from under it. So we don’t have the credit to use. This year is going to be tighter then ever and it is kind of hard to deal with as a parent. It is a combination of the economic downturn, our retail website is not making sales right now and the fact that both of us are going back to school so that we can try and get jobs next year simply because we cannot make a living off of our retail site right now. That may change eventually, but it is going to take a lot of time and some big changes in the economy.

We made the mistake of going to the mall with the kids this weekend. It was hard because we had to keep telling the kids no, we cannot buy that. We don’t have the money. Usually we try and pick them up something small, maybe $5.00 or even $10.00 each, but this time we just could not do so. They watched people filling their carts up with the toys they wanted and you could see the confusion on their little faces and they tried to understand why other people could get the toys but they could not. We will not be taking our kids into the stores again, if we can help it, until we do have a little money set aside for them.

We are going back in a week to get a Christmas picture of them with Santa, even though that is going to be about $30.00. We will try to make sure they can pick up something small on the same day, but it is going to be difficult. What is harder is knowing out kids have been asking for the same toys over and over again, and we know that we cannot get them because they are all over $30.00 each. We are going to see what we can do about getting them each one of the toys they want. We have been explaining to them that Santa can only fit so many toys in his bag, so they may only get one or two of the toys they ask for.

The truth is that they don’t need any more toys; they just want the newest ones. Also we have been buying small gifts all year, so they actually have a lot of things to go under the tree, just not what they are asking for right now. So we are not doing that bad, IT JUST FEELS THAT WAY! It is just hard when you cannot give them what they ask for; no matter how many toys you actually have under the tree, because all I thinks is Oh, I cannot buy this and I cannot buy that forgetting what I have already gotten them.

We are signed up for a Christmas basket from the Salvation Army this year and it is going to make a difference. Each kid will get one big toy and one little toy and a few small stocking stuffers. They would like to be able to do more, but the demand is way too high this year. There are way too many other families in the same situation we are in. I am going to be writing about how to have a good Christmas on a tight budget over the next few weeks.

To eat or not can be all the control a child has

2008-11-12T09:42:00.000-08:00

For some children they feel that all they control is if they eat and where they go bathroom. Getting your child to eat or use the toilet can become a battle of wills that no one wins and often results in anger and frustration for all involved. Children will resist having their control taken way just as strongly or even more so then adults. And that is completely understandable, if what you put into your mouth or where you went potty was the only things you controlled in your life you would fight to keep that control.

It can be incredibly frustrating trying to get kids to eat, especially when food is limited or you went out of your way to make sure things your child loves in on their plate. I have been there. We have accepted that our kids will not always eat and have learned to deal with it in different ways.

When ever possible we include them in our food and meal decisions. We find out what they would like for dinner and if possible we provide it. Our kids are learning that it is not always possible for us to give them what they want. Also it has to be “real food” not treats and candy. You don’t want to know how often we have cereal, hot dogs or soup for dinner these days.

Portion size. We have reduced the portions we put on our kids plates. They get a spoonful of each item. They have to have at least the number of bites equal to their age of each thing on the plate. Though we tend to be a little lenient when out of no where the kids suddenly decide that they don’t like something anymore, one bite to try and then eat the other things on the plate.

If our kids will not eat, then that is fine, at five and three they understand the consequences. No treat, or dessert unless they eat their “real” food first. If they are to full too eat anymore then they are too full for dessert. Does it go smoothly, no way! We have a screaming child demanding that they get a cookie instead of the soup they asked for. Answer, “No, you eat your dinner first or leave the table and get nothing.” Often you will hear, “We are not a restaurant, you eat what we give you.” (Keeping in mind that they were involved in the meal decisions in the first place.) If the negative behavior continues food is removed from the table and they are done. If they are hungry later (and not at bedtime) they can have their dinner, not the treat or dessert. However at all time the child in question always controls if they eat or not, that is up to them. We cannot force them to eat all we do is give them the option to eat and don’t deny them the food when they are hungry.

Kids will not starve themselves, if they are hungry they will eat. It is just not worth the battle to try and make them eat. Just don’t give in on the candy, treats and desserts, they have to eat real food first. Also don’t force your child to eat something they hate unless it is all you have to give them.