No filter on mouth, asset or hindrance?

Over the years I have learned that I have no filter on my mouth. This means I say what I am thinking, good or bad. I don’t play politics, office or otherwise. I have found this to be harmful in work situations and people can find me difficult to be friends with. I don’t seem be able to identify boundaries and keep them. This is something I am working on as I see it as a hindrance. So imagine my surprise when I went for coffee with some ladies I met at a self-esteem group and they both said they envy me because I don’t have a filter on my mouth.

They both felt that they compromised all the time, and would say what ever would make someone else happy. This was a big problem for both of them. They could never be themselves and were both very unhappy with this. They wanted to be able to say what they were thinking. Too have the confidence to be themselves and not always be playing the politics game. It was a very different viewpoint from mine. I never thought that people would admire my bluntness and openness.

There really is no point to not be honest with yourself and others. If I am having a problems what is the point of hiding it if I am looking for help. If I cannot admit to the people I am turning to for help what the real issues are how can they help me? If some one asks me to help them then they expect real answers from me, not ones that will make them feel better or what they want to hear. People who turn to me for help know I am going to be brutally blunt and honest for good and bad. If you don’t want the truth don’t ask me. I am not afraid to talk about sex and sexuality and other sensitive topics such as parenting issues and anger and that intimidates and scares some people. But at the same time I do it in a non-judgemental way, so people feel comfortable to talk about anything with me. What I need to tone down is the over sharing of my personal life or feelings in a business situation. I may be having the conversation with the right person, but not the right environment. I need to learn how to fit in and not make others uncomfortable when I have to work with them. My solution is to be my own boss, and be myself. I am over opinionated, unashamed and blunt as a sledgehammer, but still caring and kind, just very honest with others and myself.

So what do you think would you rather be? Someone who blurts things out at inappropriate moments, blunt as all can be but is honest to themselves and others or to spend so much time trying to fit in and keep everyone happy that you loose yourself? I am so glad that they took the time to let me know how they feel because it let me see how blessed I am to not have a filter on my mouth, heart or soul.

Emergency Room Dilemma – Do you go or not?

Question, do you take your kid to the emergency or wait until morning when the Doctors office or walk in clinic is open? In Hamilton we can call Telehealth Ontario, talk with a registered nurse who will assess the situation and determine what would be your best course of action. Then you know if you actually need to go to the hospital or just go see a Doctor. The idea is to help reduce the number of unnecessary visits to the emergency room. This free health service has been very helpful for us. There have been many late night calls where we have been told to stay home, do this, and then take the kids to the clinic in the morning.

When your kid is sick it is nice to be able to call and talk with someone who is a professional healthcare worker and can reassure you that you are doing the right thing, or tells you to do something different or more. As a parent of young children I want those instant answers. I don’t want to take an ambulance ride in the dead of the night and have a long wait at the hospital only to be told I could have just taken him or her to the local clinic. It is very expensive to use an ambulance, but sometimes you have no options but to use one. No one likes waiting hours in the emergency room only to get treatment at about the same time as they would have it they stayed home and went to a clinic in the morning.

I say this after my daughter had a coughing attach about 10:30 last night. She had difficulty breathing and it scared the beep out of me. We monitored her for about a ½ hour. She was having painful coughing and difficulty getting air back in. We called Telehealth Ontario and waited for their call back to us. Very quickly we had someone on the line walking us through all sorts of health questions to eliminate possible problems. The lady even had us hold the phone up to our daughter so she could hear her breathing and coughing.

The end result, she had to go to the hospital right then. So we had the fire department and two ambulances show up full sirens. Of course as soon as the firemen had arrived she stopped coughing and having problems breathing so she was not in danger anymore. We arrived at the emergency room just after midnight, was given a bed at 7:15 am, saw the Doctor at 7:30, was given medicine at 7:15 and by 8 am we were on the bus home. I spent about 4 of the almost 8 hours I was there trying to get her to go to sleep. Hard to do in a waiting room. Turns out she has Croup. It can usually be treated at home, but in some cases you do need to go to the doctors or emergency room.

So as a parent you have to make a decision to stay at home or go to the hospital. What is going to be the best thing for your children? For us it was easy, she was having problems breathing and we did not know why or what to do. It is just nice to be able to get a second professional opinion at anytime to let us know if we are panicking or does our child need to go to the hospital.