For years I have been trying to improve my parenting skills. I knew I was lacking in them. I had poor examples growing up. So when things were hard I assumed I was doing something wrong. Or I should say: I could be doing things differently. I tried parenting groups and parenting classes. Some of them helped. I learned a lot. I tried to do most of it with little or limited success.
I tried harder. I asked for help. I asked Children’s aid come in help me figure out what was wrong. Well I was sent to a program called the incredible years. It was very help full and informative. But again I only had limited success. I had a very hard time connecting with my kids. I did not have fun with them. I did not want to play with them. I tried to explain what it was like. No one seemed to get it. I thought I was a bad parent because it was so hard. One lady told me at incredible year’s course, “You are supposed to want to play with your kids, what is wrong with you!”
The good thing was that I had asked for someone to come in and help me figure out what I was doing wrong. What did the home visitor from children’s aid tell me after months of coming over to teach me how to play with my kids? It was not me. Sure I had skills to learn still, but no I was a good parent. My kids were classified as being difficult. They directed me to a program called 0-6 at the Shedoks children’s mental health.
After months of observation it was decided to have my son looked at by a special doctor. Conclusion is that my son has ADHD and ODD. I cried. Not because I was happy knowing that there was a real problem and it was not my parenting. No it was because my son is going to struggle for a long time. He will have social issues and problems at school. He now has a label.
The good thing is that the medication he is on is helping him. He is now able to do school work. He is getting along with other children, and playing with them. His violence level has been greatly reduced. More important is that other children want to play with him. He is being included now, not feared and rejected.
For me it was a shock to find out that this is the way it is supposed to be. Not the stressed out unhappy child and parents. My son is fun to be around now. I love hearing what he has to say and what his opinions are. He is a different child. Still very difficult because of the ODD, but way better then the way things were. Now I love being around my kids and playing with them.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Friday, May 1, 2009
Over the years I have seen some bad movies. The Mist Directed by Frank Darabont ranks up there in my list of worst movies. There is just something wrong with this movie. It started off pretty normal. An us against them movie. There is something out there that has us trapped and it wants to eat us. A bunch of people are stranded together and try to survive. Decedents occurs based on people’s dislike of each other and their own fears.
Then the movie starts to become uncomfortable. Not because of gore or violence. Though there is some. No it is the way the people are. How they talk to each other and react to things. People kill themselves. The relationships are not “real”. The plot line is off track and unpleasant. There was only one character that I “liked”. It was the store employee who almost makes it through the movie. He bands together with the main character against the mob mentality. He was the only likeable person. Also one of the few that had much character development.
To be blunt the ending sucks. The movie was not so great, but the ending just kills any positive thoughts I could have had. Sure the SGI was well done. But then what movie in the last year has not put the effort into the SGI work. To me it was a B movie hoping people would not notice it was. It needed a better story line or interaction between the characters to pull me in. Then it needed to something positive going on. It did not. Everything was negative and getting worse. There were no endearing moments.
It did not even feel as if the movie was trying to capture your attention. It was trying to be different and disturbing. All it did was make me dislike it. I did not read the book beforehand. I was not even sure what the story line was before I watched it. It was suppose to be a physiological thriller. It fell short. If you have the opportunity to watch The Mist, miss it. Not worth the bad taste it leaves in your head. Any movie that has the main character kill his son and the other survivors’ moments before rescue is just wrong.